A Bevy of Book Reviews

I noticed that I hadn't blogged in awhile, mostly because I haven't been doing much - other than reading. And other than the holidays, not much has been going on of interest. Here's a short list of some of the books that I've recently read and brief reviews (the 'star' rating is out of 5 stars):

1.  The Paris Wife by Paula McLain has been hailed as a brilliant work of fiction, but I don't understand the praise.  The novel was beyond boring.  Set in the 1920s and narrated by Hadley Richardson (Ernest Hemingway's first wife), it tells a fictionalized story of the Hemingways' time in Paris. First let me say, I hate Hemingway and all the writers of his era (Ezra Pound, Gertrude Stein, F. Scott Fitzgerald, etc.) and the fact that all these bombastic, boring, self-absorbed characters are featured in Ms. McLain's book holds no interest for me.  Additionally, Hadley is a doormat and lives only for Hemingway and has no voice of her own.  She's boring and the dialogue is forced and tedious. I actually could not even finish this novel. If you're interested in Hemingway's life in Paris, read his memoir A Moveable Feast.  1 star

2.  Another novel which is garnering high praise is A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian by Marina Lewycka.  Again I don't quite understand the hoopla surrounding this banal novel.  The New York Times review stated that it was "extremely funny" and yet I didn't laughed once. It's the story of an 86 year old man who is marrying a 36 year old Ukrainian woman so that she can get permanent resident status in England for herself and her son and how the old man's two daughters (once estranged from each other) come together to attempt to stop the marriage. Ridiculously predictable and horribly repetitive, this book is not worth the time or effort.  It might have been a better short story rather than a novel.  This is yet another book that I could not finish.  1 star

3. Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice is my favorite book of all time. Well written, interesting characters, amusing, etc., Pride and Prejudice never fails to enchant me no matter how many times I've read it. I am often told of other novels that are either continuations of the story or retelling of the story (i.e., Pride and Prejudice and Zombies and Mr. Darcy Takes a Wife) and nearly all are unmitigated disasters. Death Comes to Pemberly by P.D James is one of the exceptions. While DCtP will never be P&P's equal, it is a satisfying effort of continuing the story of Elizabeth and Fitzwilliam Darcy.  Set six years after the wedding of the Darcys, a murder has occurred on the Pemberly estate.  As a mystery, it is not conventional and probably not what most readers would expect when hearing about the book. Mr. Darcy doesn't suddenly put on a deerstalker hat and turn detective. But the way the story plays out is more true to the time and place, and to Austen's style, than it would have been if Ms. James had tried to insert a detective story onto an Austen sequel. As a lover of Jane Austen, I was happy to spend this time at Pemberley, revisiting these familiar characters and seeing their later lives depicted in a way that is faithful to the depth and complexity that Austen gave them. I was disappointed that there wasn't more time spent with Darcy and Elizabeth together, but that's more of a quibble than a serious criticism.  4 stars

4. After reading City of Thieves by David Benioff, I am now fascinated by The Siege of Leningrad, the setting for this brilliant novel. I would never have dreamed that a story set during this horrendous time in history could be as engaging and darkly humorous as this book, but Mr. Benioff has done an excellent job of bringing a diverse set of characters to life; two of whom have been given an impossible mission (find a dozen eggs!) in an unbearable situation (the Blockade of Leningrad, and its consequent famine). The two lead characters are Lev, a 17 year old Jew who is arrested for looting a German paratrooper's corpse (and the book's narrator) and Koyla, a 19 year old Cossack who is accused of desertion from the army.  The two men are tasked with finding a dozen eggs for the head of the NKVD  to be used in a wedding cake for his daughter's upcoming nuptials.  If they fail, their punishment will be execution.  In their week long adventure which takes them through a series of nightmarish war zones, Lev and Koyla come across an array of strange characters including cannibals, prostitutes, starving children, and demonic Nazi chess enthusiasts.  I highly recommend this thoroughly gripping read!  5 stars

5.  I spent approximately a week re-reading the Harry Potter series.  I originally started reading the novels in 2001, when only books 1-4 had been released. I quickly fell in love with the world that J.K. Rowling created. With each new novel release, I would go back and re-read all the previous novels and then read the new novel. Altogether I've probably read the books 10-12 times (if not more). Approximately once a year, I re-read all 7 books and am always enthralled with the magical world of Harry Potter. It boggles the mind that there are people in this world who would want to see these books banned. A wonderful morality tale of good versus evil and the endurance of true friendship. If you've been living on the moon or under a rock and haven't read this series, you need to run... not walk... to your nearest bookstore or library and start reading these books!  35 stars which is 5 stars for each of the 7 books.

Happy reading!

Don't be Part of "The Inner Circle"

Let me preface this review in saying that, in general, I enjoy mystery thriller novels that have an historic backstory. I've read Dan Brown's The DaVinci Code and liked it. The Amber Room and The Romanov Prophecy by Steve Berry were enjoyable (albeit not very memorable) novels. I have read most of Brad Meltzer's novels (i.e, The Zero Game, The Tenth Justice, The First Counsel), which are exciting thrillers, but for some reason I just could not get through The Inner Circle, Meltzer's latest novel.

Synopsis:  "Beecher White, a young archivist, spends his days working with the most important documents of the U.S. government. He has always been the keeper of other people's stories, never a part of the story himself...Until now. When Beecher's first childhood crush, Clementine Kaye [whom Beecher annoyingly calls "Clemmie"] shows up at the National Archives asking for his help tracking down her long-lost father, Beecher tries to impress her by showing her the secret vault where the President of the United States privately reviews classified documents. After they accidentally happen upon a priceless artifact - a 200 hundred-year-old dictionary that once belonged to George Washington, hidden underneath a desk chair, Beecher and Clementine find themselves suddenly entangled in a web of deception, conspiracy, and murder.  Soon a man is dead, and Beecher is on the run as he races to learn the truth behind this mysterious national treasure. His search will lead him to discover a coded and ingenious puzzle that conceals a disturbing secret from the founding of our nation. It is a secret, Beecher soon discovers, that some believe is worth killing for."

Review: I recognize that you have suspend your disbelief when it comes to mystery thriller novels, but this novel is annoyingly incredulous. Approximately 100+ pages into the 450-page novel, I tossed the book down and couldn't read one more sentence. Initially, I was looking forward to reading this novel. The idea of a protagonist who works in the National Archives was a interesting concept, but unfortunately, that was the most interesting part of this novel. Just within the first 100+ pages, there's a mysterious death of the security guard, Clementine's father is discovered to be an attempted assassin of a previous President of the United States (currently living in a mental hospital for the criminally insane), a mysterious book dating back to George Washington, Beecher implicitly trusting his childhood flame, Clementine, whom he hasn't seen in 17 years, and a whole host of other nonsense. This seemed like a train wreck just waiting to happen. After deciding not to finish the book, I read some additional reviews. It turns out Meltzer does not even give the reader a definitive ending (as this book is just the first in a series featuring the character of Beecher White). Ugh! I hate that! Each novel should be a complete story and not leave you with a "cliffhanger" ending. Blech!

All in all, I'm glad I didn't waste more than a couple of hours struggling through the first quarter of this novel. If someone has read this novel and has a different opinion, I'd be interested in hearing it.

One additional note, I think Meltzer needs to rethink all of his characters names, not just "Clemmie." Who lives in a world where you are surrounded by people named Aristotle ("Tot"), Dallas, Beecher, Nico, Clementine ("Clemmie"), Venkat, Orson, Andre? No one does! Most of my office jobs have been filled with Mikes, Johns, Marys and Sues. Not an Aristotle or Beecher in sight!

Rating: 1 out of 5 stars

"Can You Keep a Secret?"

What would you do if you suddenly spilled all your innermost secrets to a complete stranger during a moment of stress only to discover that "stranger" is actually the multimillionaire CEO of the corporation you work for?  This is dilemma of Emma Corrigan, the novel's protagonist, in Sophie Kinsella's, Can You Keep a Secret?  Emma begins to wonder if her life could get any worse and then it does!  

Just a sampling of some of this irrepressible woman's secrets are:

Secrets from her mother:
I lost my virginity in the spare bedroom with Danny Nussbaum while Mum and Dad were downstairs watching Ben-Hur.
Sammy the goldfish in my parents’ kitchen is not the same goldfish that Mum gave me to look after when she and Dad were in Egypt.

Secrets from her boyfriend:
I weigh one hundred and twenty-eight pounds. Not one eighteen, like Connor thinks.
I’ve always thought Connor looks a bit like Ken. As in Barbie and Ken.

Secrets from her colleagues:
When Artemis really annoys me, I feed her plant orange juice. (Which is pretty much every day.) 

It was me who jammed the copier that time. In fact, all the times.

Secrets she wouldn’t share with anyone in the world:
My G-string is hurting me.
I have no idea what NATO stands for. Or even what it is.

This is actually the second time I've read this novel.  I first read this book back in 2004 when the novel was released. In perusing the stacks of the library yesterday, I came across this book and I thought that I'd re-read it and see if it was still as enjoyable. I must say it did not disappoint.  Funny, moving and surprisingly thoughtful, Secret is a fun look at relationships and what happens when you're either completely truthful with people or tell little fibs to make everyone's life easier.  

Yes, it is definitely a chick novel.  No, it will never win a Pulitzer prize for literature. But it is a fun, funny novel which entertains. And really is there anything better than that??

Stephanie Plum is Smokin' Once Again!

I have been reading the Janet Evanovich's Stephanie Plum series for well over a decade. The series is currently at book seventeen with an eighteenth book scheduled for release later this month. Up until the fourteenth book, I was enjoying the series immensely, but I noticed that books 14, 15 and 16 weren't up to the quality of the previous 13 books and it felt like perhaps Ms. Evanovich was losing interest in writing for this character. Well, Janet Evanovich is back! Smokin' Seventeen bears all the earmarks of a classic Stephanie Plum novel: wacky characters, several dead bodies, hilarious situations and a bevy of destroyed cars.

For those who have never read a Stephanie Plum novel, here's a synopsis of the series:  Born in Trenton, NJ and raised in the Chambersburg neighborhood (or the Burg as it's known locally) of Trenton, Stephanie is of Italian-Hungarian descent, has a fast metabolism, brown curly hair, blue eyes, a penchant for getting into trouble and is a bounty hunter - a really, really bad bounty hunter! In One of the Money, the first novel in the series, Stephanie blackmailed her cousin Vinnie, into hiring her as a bounty hunter, when she has zero experience. Somehow through dumb luck and perseverance, Stephanie is fairly successful. In Smokin' Seventeen, "dead bodies are showing up in shallow graves on the empty construction lot of Vincent Plum Bail Bonds. No one is sure who the killer is, or why the victims have been offed, but what is clear is that Stephanie's name is on the killer's list...With a cold-blooded killer after her, a handful of hot men and a capture list that includes a dancing bear and a senior citizen vampire, Stephanie's life looks like it's about to go up in smoke."

Other than books 14-16, the Stephanie Plum series does not disappoint. Yes, the situations are improbable but that is what makes it for fun, light-hearted reading. If you haven't read any of the series, I say give it a go. If you stopped reading along the way because you started to get disappointed, then pick up Smokin' Seventeen and enjoy the fun again!

The Lives of Gen X'ers in "One Day"

Now that the weather and the clocks have changed, you will notice an increase in book reviews. Reading is the best winter activity!! (It definitely beats sliding down a snow-covered hill, at 20 mph, strapped to 2 pieces of wood, screaming at the top of my lungs and face planting into a pile of snow.)

I had seen advertising for the movie, One Day, starring Ann Hathaway and Jim Sturgiss and found the premise interesting. What I found even more interesting was that it was originally a novel.  As I nearly always try to read the book before watching the movie, I patiently waited for this book to be available at my local library.  It well worth the wait!

"It’s 1988 and Dexter Mayhew and Emma Morley have only just met. The both know that the next day, after college graduation, they must go their separate ways. But after only one day together, they cannot stop thinking about one another. Over twenty years, snapshots of that relationship are revealed on the same day (July 15th) of each year. Dex and Em face squabbles and fights, hopes and missed opportunities, laughter and tears. And as the true meaning of this one crucial day is revealed, they must come to grips with the nature of love and life itself." (From the publisher)  Set predominantly in London, the twenty years of Dex and Em spans a lifetime of memories from births to deaths, relationship happiness and disappointments, marriages and divorces, career successes and failures, but at the heart of it all is an everlasting friendship and love that these two people have for each other.

Anyone who has ever had a person with whom they share a special bond will appreciate this book. But if you were born anywhere between the mid-60s and the early 70s, One Day by David Nicholls will be extra special as it follows the time span of Generation X. It will bring back memories of clubbing in the 80s and 90s, the heady days of drinking and drugging, the birth of cell phones and cds, and the pitfalls and triumphs of aging during the 80s, 90s and 2000s. These are characters and situations that I related to quite well. In fact, I almost felt like David Nicholls had read my diary and wrote a book about my life. Scary! Filled with witty British dialogue and unforgettable characters, One Day is a triumph. For anyone not terribly familiar with England, you might not quite understand some of the references, but the storyline is ultimately very relatable as relationships are essentially the same anywhere in the world.  "I laughed, I cried, it was better than Cats."  (Then, again - what isn't better than Cats?)

I can only hope the movie lives up to the book. But I doubt it will. As my local bookstore posted:

Phones in Bathrooms? What?

I know I keep banging on about manners, but each day I get more and more shocked at the liberties that people take. For instance, today I witnessed someone on a business conference call who, I suppose, figured that he needed to use the men's room. As he was on a wireless headset, he decided to go to the bathroom while on the call. Is it just me? Have I become a stick in the mud? But candidly, I find that type of behavior to be reprehensible. Why wouldn't you just tell the other caller that you need to put them on hold (to take another call... the building's on fire... the dog ate my homework, whatever), go 'do your business' and then return to the call? Quite frankly the last thing I want to hear while I'm on a call is someone using the toilet, particularly a business call. Talk about unprofessional. And don't tell me that no one notices. Yes, they notice - they just don't want to talk about it.

This isn't the first time I've witnessed this act. Have you ever been in a public bathroom in... oh... let's say, a mall and someone is on their cell phone, in the next stall, having a conversation which is generally some mind-numbing prattle of little importance? I even heard one woman complain when another person flushed a toilet, because she was on a call and couldn't hear her conversation. Really? What was the other woman supposed to do, leave a mess for someone else to clean up? Of course, 'cell phone woman' would probably be the first to complain that someone didn't flush a toilet.

When did we get so lax in our manners that phone usage in bathrooms is considered acceptable behavior? Personally the last place I want to sit and have a chat is in the bathroom. The "eeeeuuuwww" factor is pretty high on that. I wouldn't even do it in the comfort of my own home, let alone in an office or public bathroom; equally out of consideration for the person I'm talking to and my own sense of being. <shrugs> Maybe it IS just me. 

A Profile in Courage!

Today, I read a very moving and inspiring article in my local newspaper about a local high school senior who has participated in 12 seasons of cross country and track. Why is that feat so impressive? The student being profiled has cerebral palsy and his doctors told his parents that he would be unlikely to ever walk, never mind run. Sean Mitchell is an inspiration for all of us about overcoming adversity. He went from a 60 minute 5k in his first race to a 27 minute 5k in his final race. Now that's an amazing accomplishment! He didn't allow his 'physical limitations' to stop him from participating in an activity that he truly loves. What does that say about the rest of us 'healthy' people?

Many people, myself included, often forget just how fortunate we are because we get bogged down by the minutiae of our lives and don't consider the big picture. It's easy to get frustrated by all the things we don't have or need or want and even easier to forget all the great things we do have. No, our lives are not perfect - does anyone have a perfect life? If you say "yes," then you're either very, very lucky or very forgiving or delusional. The parts of my life that I'm thankful for are: excellent friends, my health, my humor, my intelligence and a loving, lovely kitty cat. That's more than many people have and I am grateful for all of it. Today, I challenge you to make a list of all the things that make your life a fulfilling one and remind yourself how blessed you truly are. 

I found #2&7 to be particularly relevant!

A Stargazers Tale!

One of my favorite pastimes is stargazing. I fondly remember, while living in the suburbs, hanging out with friends in backyards, flopped on our backs, chatting and watching the stars. We would challenge everyone to try to find all the constellations: Cassiopeia, the Big Dipper, the Little Dipper, Orion, Andromeda, etc.  Then I moved to New York City. Ever try to stargaze in NYC? You're correct - it's impossible. Thanks to the skies being light-polluted, the tall buildings which block off views of the firmament, and the fact that spending time in poorly lighted, unpopulated areas is not considered a smart thing to do. Therefore, there's very limited opportunity to stargaze, other than taking trips to the Hayden Planetarium, which I think I only did once or twice in my 17 years in NYC.

Why do I mention this?  Tonight, I was feeling a little claustrophobic in my apartment and decided to take a stroll to the library to return a book and pick up a new one. I happened to look up to see the most gorgeous night sky: a near full moon and tons of stars visible. I had nearly forgotten how amazing the night sky can be. I took a seat on a bench near the library and just gazed at the lovely night sky. Into my head popped the following nursery rhyme:

"Star light, star bright,
The first star I see tonight,
I wish I may, I wish I might,
Have the wish I wish tonight."

Now I haven't wished upon a star in 35 years, after I realized that it never worked. If it had, I would have gotten the Barbie Dream House that I wished for time and time again.  Still I decided to be a little silly tonight and made my wish, just for old time's sake. Don't ask me what I wished for because it's a secret. When was the last time you wished upon a star? That long ago, huh?? Well, get up off your couch, go to the window and make your wish. Just a little reminder that it's okay to be silly sometimes.

I did not wish for this!

"The Radleys" Had Such Potential

Does the world really need yet another vampire story? The literary world is awash with a bevy of vampire novels: The Twilight saga, the Vampire Chronicles, the Southern Vampire Mysteries (Sookie Stackhouse) series, Salem's Lot, I Am Legend and the masterpiece - Bram Stoker's Dracula, just to name a few.

Cashing in on the recent vampire craze, British author Matt Haig has penned The Radleys. Set  in modern day England - in the small village of Bishopthorpe located in North Yorkshire, the Radleys are an ordinary, humdrum middle class family, who just happen to be vampires. As with many of the modern novels, there are two types of vampires; in this novel they are: the practicing (blood drinking) vampire and the abstaining (non-blood drinking) vampire. The Radleys are the latter of the two. The parents bend over backwards keeping up appearances with their bourgeois neighbors, attempting to deny their innate blood-lust and refusing to tell their two teenage, angst-ridden children that they are all vampires. Unconscious of this vampiric knowledge, one evening, the daughter defends herself from a over amorous bully to a horrifying 'bloody' end. The family must now deal with the aftermath of this murder, the burgeoning vampirism with their children, their own marital issues and a police investigation. Rounding out the story is a Byronic uncle whose influence is felt throughout the local vampire community of northern England and whose past is linked with his sister-in-law's.

This novel had so much promise. Witty British humor and a clever story was bogged down by countless pages of tedious vampire lore that did nothing to move the story forward. Interestingly enough, had those passages been edited or removed altogether, this novel would have been brilliant. Once I got past the boring sections (after approximately reading two-thirds of the book), the story moved along like a speeding bullet to a very exciting conclusion. On a scale of 1 to 5, I'd give this story a 3. With better editing, I would have raised it to a 4. It's also a very quick read, having finished it in less than a day. This book would definitely appeal to anyone who loves the vampire genre.

Movies, Movies, Movies

Have you ever felt this way?  (Warning: contains strong language)

Neither have I!

Actually, this clip is from one of my all time favorite films, A Fish Called Wanda. I love watching movies because they're a great source of entertainment and distraction. I recently requested responses to a movie survey that I created to find out the movie habits of other movie watchers - a truly fascinating undertaking. The survey questions posted were: how often did the respondent watch movies; what is their all time favorite movie; worse movie; favorite guilty pleasure movie; and whether or not they had ever walked out on a movie and asked for money back.

1.  62% of the respondents watched movies 'moderately often' which shows that they actually have a social life! Well done, you! The other 38% watched movies 'extremely often' - no worries, that's my response too. Yeah, I don't have a social life.

2.  The list of 'favorite all time movies' ran the gamut - from comedies to dramas: The Princess Bride, Titanic, The Shawshank Redemption, Shrek, The Replacements, Harold and Maude and Chasing Amy. Now personally I agree with The Princess Bride, The Shawshank Redemption and Shrek. But Chasing Amy? Ugh! That movie actually makes my list of one of the worse movies I've ever watched. Titanic is a tough call for me. I thought the first 2 hours were horrendously bad. I barely could make it through them, but the last hour was brilliant... well, not the entire hour:  I loved from the moment the ship hit the iceberg until Kate Winslet ridiculously couldn't scream for help but had enough air to blow a whistle. What the...???  Okay, I really didn't like Titanic. It's tough for me to name just one favorite movie. There are just too many.

3.  The list of worse movies: The English Patient (fo' shizzle!), Jackass, Hut Tub Time Machine (just the title makes me not want to watch this movie; a shame because I love John Cusack), Elektra, A.I. and Wagons East. No complaints from me about this list.  Pretty much, it is right on the money. For me, the worse movie was The Blair Witch Project... or Moulin Rouge.... or Boxing Helena... or The Piano... or... well, never mind. My list again is too long.

4.  Guilty pleasure movies had the most fascinating responses!  Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead, Staying Alive, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Footloose (1984), Dirty Dancing, Miss Congeniality, Grease and Pretty Woman. Actually, I like most these films and agree that they're all great guilty pleasure movies.  For the record, mine is Down Periscope. I don't know why, but every time this movie is on, I MUST watch it! It's juvenile and stupid and yet I cannot help myself.

5.  50% of the respondents said that they had walked out of a movie theater because a film was unwatchable, but no one has ever asked for their money back.  I have walked out of an unwatchable movie (i.e., JFK), but I, too, would never ask for my money back. In my opinion, it's always a luck of the draw if a movie is worth the $10-$20 ticket price, and you can't blame the theater for an unwatchable film. Though I have always wanted to ask the production company for my money back, but I've never actually tried it.

The most interesting thing about the list of movies that were provided is that they're all fairly recent films. The earliest movie listed, Harold and Maude, is from 1971. Generally speaking, the movies made in the past 30 or 40 years are superbly better than many earlier movies; from the quality of the material to how acting has improved over the years and the improvement in production. A short list of some note-worthy movies from pre-1970 are: Battleship Potemkin, Bringing Up Baby, Gone With the Wind, Citizen Kane and The Wizard of Oz.  There are a many, many more, but these are some of the best, in my humble opinion.

A sincere thank you to everyone who responded to my survey. Feel free to continue to respond, as I'd definitely be interested in hearing from more movie watchers.  For all A Fish Called Wanda fans who would like to view The Full Otto, check out this video (I dare you not to laugh):

A well deserved Oscar for Kevin Kline!!!

"Our Guys" - A Disturbing Look at Suburbia

I am a huge fan of the Law & Order franchise, particularly the original series. Their "ripped from the headlines" stories often got me to research the inspiration for the episodes. Recently, I re-watched one very disturbing episode from Season 8 (1998), "Damaged", which deals with the three high school athletes who sexual assault a mentally challenged 17-year old girl. I vaguely recalled hearing something about this case back in the late 80s/early 90s when I was living in New Jersey. Lo and behold, after a little research, I found the "Glen Ridge rape" case. I also discovered that Bernard Lefkowitz, an Edgar Award-winning author, wrote a very detailed, meticulously investigated book on this case.  Our Guys (1997) not only discusses the case and the parties involved, but the society that the athletes were brought up in and how the affluent town of Glen Ridge created an atmosphere of acceptance of this type of behavior.  After all, "boys will be boys."

On a blustery afternoon in March 1989, a group of teenage athletes lured a 17-year old mentally retarded girl to a basement in Glen Ridge, New Jersey, and gang-raped her. An horrific act in and of itself, but the fact that these boys had a history of behavioral problems and had created a pack mentality, which led to their belief in their own superiority over everyone else, makes this reprehensible act even worse. Add to that, the parents, teachers and other authority figures, who turned a blind eye to repeated acts of vandalism, sexual misconduct and other forms of antisocial behavior by this group and writing these acts off as the boys being "high spirited," makes this a societal issue and not an isolated case of a group of teenagers behaving badly. In the town of Glen Ridge, from the time these children are 5 years of age, they are taught that athletes are the best and the brightest (regardless of the reality), are held in the highest regard and are an example for all others to aspire to be. If you're not an athlete, then you're not important.

The frightening thing about this situation is that this type of behavior could happen anywhere. When certain groups are given carte blanche to behave any way they please, then they develop a sense of entitlement. Athletes have always been given preferential treatment, whether professional, college, high school or youth, and it's time we stop treating athletes as something special. I'm not saying there isn't a place for sports, but the fact that it takes higher precedence over academic, artistic or intellectual pursuits is fundamental wrong. Our Guys is a frighteningly real tale of a morally bankrupt society in a place where one wouldn't expect such events to occur. I would hate to call it an "enjoyable" read, but it is a book well worth the time and effort to read if for no other reason than to be aware of the societal implications of the case. If this book doesn't anger you, then you need to look inside yourself and ask "Why doesn't it?"

A Dollar and a Dream!

I read a blog the other day about a man who knew a co-worker who won $38 million in their state lottery and after she collected her winnings, no one ever saw or heard from her again. I imagine that must happen a lot because the winners don't want every Tom, Dick and Harry hitting them up for money. Why do I bring this up?

I am sure we've all had this thought, "if only I would win the lottery..." Last night, I had stopped in a local convenience store and saw that the Powerball jackpot was $245 million and I figured "what the heck" and plunked down a couple of bucks. I don't play the lottery often but that didn't stop me from spending last night and today dreaming about what I would do if I won $245 million. I definitely would not be working a ruddy office job - GUARANTEED, but otherwise what would I do? Would I up and disappear? Not a chance! But I would have no problems whatsoever telling people "no" when being asked for money. First, I'd buy a new car. Nothing fancy, nothing outrageously expensive, just newer than my '95 Jeep. Next, I'd pay off my debts (okay, maybe that should be done first). I would give a decent chunk to various charities. Then, I'd invest the rest of it in something that would give me a steady rate of return. After that, I'm not sure. 

Would I travel? Wwwwwwwell, I do love to travel, but traveling on my own has gotten old and my cat might not like me being away so much. Okay, some limited travel. Buy a house? Probably. No McMansions for me - something small. After all, how much room does one person with a cat need? How about starting my own theatre company and perform every show I've ever dreamed of performing? That's a possibility. I'd call it Vanity Productions. Hamlet played by a 40-something plus-sized woman. Hmmm. Perhaps I'd open up a business. Owning a little bookstore has been a long time wish (which really is just an excuse to spend my day reading). Maybe start my own charitable organization, like Alison did in At Home With The Braithwaites (a British comedy-drama television show which ran in the early 2000s).  Go back to school and get my Master's and PhD degrees? Truth is, with enough money, I could do all these things (except maybe the Hamlet part). The possibilities are endless when you have the funds. Most of these wishes I probably could to do without the funding but it would be much more difficult.

The reality: I have the world's worse luck therefore I know I will not be winning the $245 million, but it's nice to spend some time just thinking about the good you could do with that kind of money. The other reality is that I don't need $245 million. I would settle for a couple hundred thousand which would be enough to change my life for the better.

What would you do if you won the lottery?

[Follow up - 11/3: I was right, I did not win the $245 million, but there is someone in Connecticut who can make that claim.  Lucky dog!]

"Winter's Bone" - Why Did I Bother?

Can I get back the 6 or 7 hours that I just wasted?? Please?!

Often, there are books that are so over-hyped that one feels compelled to read them and then about halfway through one wonders what all the hype is about.  Examples of such books are: Stephanie Meyer's The Twilight saga, Nicholas Sparks' The Notebook, Lauren Weisberger's The Devil Wears Prada (a better movie than book) and The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. Winter's Bone by Daniel Woodrell fits into this category. I know I'm in the minority but this book is a serious yawn fest. Set in the Ozarks, it tells the story of a 16-year old girl, Ree Dolly, who is searching for her father (who is facing charges that he is running a meth lab) before he skips bail and the family loses their house and land which the father has used as collateral for the bail. The subject matter is depressing, dark and gritty, which isn't the reason I didn't like the novel. The problems with this book are many. First, the characters are wholly unsympathetic. I just don't care what happens to any of them. Perhaps if Woodrell had given his readers more of a backstory, I might have connected with (at least) the lead character, but alas, no. Even when she is being brutalized in one form or another, I merely thought, "Whatever." Another problem is that Woodrell spends so much time on environmental description that he neglects to actually give any plot that goes anywhere. Woodrell can write beautifully descriptive passages, but that's about all. I also have problems with the dialect Woodrell writes in, which has been called "country noir" or "hillbilly noir." I found it to be extraordinarily distracting and I get that people talk like this, but being a language snob, I just hate reading a novel that is rife with atrocious grammar. Lastly, there is no redemption found in this book whatsoever and perhaps he is presenting an über-realistic view that occurs on a daily basis, but Woodrell's characters do not to change their lives, which is not annoying. They don't learn from anything or grow from their experiences. Anyone can find a way to break out of their horrendous existence if they truly want to. Tragic heroines piss me off because they don't have to be so tragic. Grow some cojones and fix your life.

I've heard this writer and book compared to Faulkner and his writings, but I seriously doubt that Woodrell will ever receive a Pulitzer for his novels. (Then again, I don't like Faulkner's writings either, so maybe the comparison is not so far off.)  I am not entirely certain how Winter's Bone got all the rave reviews it did - maybe people were paid off or they were all written by the publishing company, but I would have rather spent my time watching paint dry than read this book. Perhaps the film fares better than the book, but as I probably won't bother watching the movie, I will never know.

"Stories I Only Tell My Friends" - And Now the World!

Like most people who are 40-something, I have been watching watching Rob Lowe's meteoric rise to fame, unbelievable crash and eventual career resurgence for the past 25+ years. As a long time admirer of Rob Lowe, I was excited to read his autobiography, Stories I Only Tell My Friends, which is a fascinating look at Hollywood from an insider who has been equally the golden boy and the goat. A uncompromisingly honest and surprisingly funny memoir, Rob has had a truly fascinating life and has met an amazingly diverse group of Hollywood royalty from Cary Grant to Liza Minnelli to Lucille Ball, plus a bevy of politicos, such as JFK, Jr., Michael Dukakis and Bill Clinton. Having spent his formative years in Malibu hanging around the likes of Emilio Estevez, Charlie Sheen, Sean and Chris Penn, long before they were household names, Rob has some of the most entertaining stories of these future stars. For anyone who is or wishes to be an actor, it's also an engrossing look at the machinations of "the business" and the politics behind it all. Additionally, for any performer, Rob shares his insights on the craft of acting, including one of my favorite passages:

"I've never agreed with the conventional wisdom that 'actors are great liars.' If more people understood the acting process, the goals of good actors, the conventional wisdom would be 'actors are terrible liars,' because only bad actors lie on the job. The good ones hate fakery and avoid manufactured emotion at all costs. Any script is enough of a lie anyway. (What experience does any actor have with flying a spacecraft? Killing someone?) What's called for, what actors are hired for, is to bring reality to the arbitrary," (Lowe, p 107)

Huzzah! Thank you, Rob, for nicely summing up what my acting coach and I have been saying for years!

An entirely enjoyable read, I applaud Rob Lowe for his honesty and his wonderful ability to laugh at himself. Good for you, Rob!  Intelligent, funny and honest - it's nice to know he's more than just a pretty face. 

A Little Bromance!

I recently discovered a 'new' television channel, The Retro Television Network, which actually has been around since 2005, but I had never come across it before a few weeks ago. Most of the shows currently airing aren't anything I want to watch (Highway to Heaven, really?), with one notable exception: I have been watching reruns of Starsky & Hutch every night and loving every minute of it. What's better than a kitchy '70s cop show? But it got me thinking about all the great television 'bromances.' My definition of the best bromances are those friends who will do anything for their bro and forgive them for all their transgressions because their friendship means more than any slight. Here is the list of my top television bromances.  I'm sure I'm missing some of your favorites.  If I am, don't yell at me - write your own competing blog.  :-)

1.  Dave Starsky and Ken ("Hutch") Hutchinson (Starsky & Hutch):  For me, the street-wise Starsky and intellectual Hutch represent the quintessential bromance. These guys would literally take a bullet for their partner. They consistently show how much they care for each other - from Starsky taking care of Hutch after mobsters repeatedly inject him with heroin to garner information to Hutch supporting, comforting and making Starsky laugh after Starsky's beloved girlfriend dies. This show (I believe) was the first to give an accurate depiction of a bromance - where they were unafraid to actually show their emotional connection to each other. By far, this is still one of my favorite shows from the '70s. It also helped that I had a HUGE crush on Paul Michael Glaser (truth be known - I still do), which is why I've been having so much fun watching these shows all over again. The only issue I have with this show is that no plainclothes detective would ever drive around in a cherry red Ford Gran Torino with a white stripe down the side - no matter how cool a car it was!  

2.  Dr. Gregory House and Dr. James Wilson (House): Both are brilliant doctors, but that's about all they have in common. House is a misanthrope, Wilson is a humanitarian. House has never been married, Wilson has been married 3 times. House thinks everyone lies, Wilson believes most people are good. They are polar opposites and yet they have one of the strongest relationships currently on television and arguable of all time. They even made the cover of TV Guide in October 2008 with an article entitled: "Isn't It Bromantic?" Although I saw a posted opinion that their relationship is really "a destructive codependency," which is perhaps true - but whatever it is, it certainly works. Even when House, at the end of last season, crashes his car into Cuddy's house and breaks Wilson's wrist in the process, they still manage to repair this weirdly functioning dysfunctional relationship.

3.  Benjamin Franklin ("Hawkeye") Pierce and B.J. Hunnicutt (M*A*S*H): One of the best shows ever (in my humble opinion), M*A*S*H symbolized true 'brothers in arms' - particularly in the characters of Hawkeye and B.J. Knee deep in blood, guts and gore, these two surgeons manage to make us laugh and cry, sometimes in a matter of seconds. They supported each other through the worse kind of hell and managed to play pranks, have a laugh or two and the occasional mental breakdown in the process. The final scene from the television movie ("Goodbye, Farewell and Amen") still makes me cry - nearly 30 years later.

4.  Richie Cunningham and Arthur ("Fonzie") Fonzarelli (Happy Days): I can still recall to this day the slightly cheesy episode ("Richie Almost Dies") where Richie has bought a motorcycle.  He crashes it and ends up in the hospital, where it's questionable if he'll ever wake out of a coma. One of the more dramatic moments on Happy Days, and Henry Winkler's performance was brilliant. It solidified what the viewers already knew which was that these friends were more than mere friends but brothers. (Whatever happened to Chuck Cunningham anyway??) I'm sure in the 1950s, the last thing an ordinary middle class American family would want in their lives is a leather clad, motorcycle riding hoodlum, but somehow it works in this Hollywood fiction.

Honorable Mentions:

Lenny and Squiggy from Laverne & Shirley
Jamie and Adam from Mythbusters (the only non-fictional people on my list)
Fred and Barney from The Flintstones
Sam and Al from Quantum Leap
Jerry and George from Seinfeld

The one consistent thing with television bromances is that the bros are very different characters from each other; generally complete opposites, which is why these partnerships work so well. They balance each other out marvelously. Well done, Hollywood! Which is your favorite bromantic couple? Take this survey.

[Side Note: When I was writing this blog, I did a spell check and every oddly spelled name came up as needing to be fixed, except 'Fonzie' which says something about the impact The Fonz had on our culture.]

Missing New York City? Not on Your Life!

It's been nearly 5 months since I've moved from New York City to Massachusetts, but it feels much longer than that. New York City now seems a lifetime ago. I keep getting asked by random people (co-workers, job interviewers, friends, etc.) if I miss NYC and I give them an emphatic "No!" Okay, that's not entirely true. I missed NYC once, when I was stuck in traffic for 2 hours because of flooding. I kept thinking if I were in NYC, I would have been on the subway and not getting a cramp in my leg from the clutch. Otherwise, I don't miss NYC.

Are there things about the City that I miss? Well now, that's a different story. While I don't miss city life, there are a few things that I do miss. For instance, the cherry cream scones from Amy's Bread, the unlimited amount of restaurants and cuisine to choose from and most of all - my friends. But otherwise, not much else. There's so much to do here in Massachusetts that I'm never really bored. The North Shore provides a multitude of cultural events that I could fill every minute of my day if I had the time and money. Plus there is always the local library if all else fails. Reading a good book, priceless. So no, I don't miss the dirt, the endless noise, the crazy cab drivers, the crowds, the filthy subway, the unwashed homeless, the rude people, the rats which are big enough to ride, etc.

I've been equating my time in NYC as being at a really great party too long. You get to a party at 7pm and by 10pm, you've chatted with everyone, had some nibbles and a beverage or two. You think, "this was fun but maybe I should go home now" but you stay. Next thing you know, it's 4am and you're stumbling down the street, barefoot, with traces of vomit down the front of your shirt, and wondering where the heck you left your shoes. (Wow! '80s flashback.) Out of the 17 years of living in Manhattan, 11-12 were fantastic. It's the last 5-6 where living in the City started to get to me. I stayed at the party just a little too long and it has left a terrible impression. Maybe one day I'll enjoy visiting NYC, but I won't ever live there again.

Here's an entertaining article that The Onion posted September 2, 2010: "8.4 Million New Yorkers Suddenly Realize New York City A Horrible Place To Live." Brilliant! Here's a really fun blog from someone who currently lives in NYC: I Hate New York City.

I remember this! <shudder>

"A Secret Kept" - Decent "2nd" Novel

After thoroughly enjoying reading and reviewing Sarah's Keys (2007) by Tatiana de Rosnay a couple of weeks ago, I decided to read her next novel, A Secret Kept (2010) and while not as engrossing as Sarah's Key, it was still a very good read. Set in France (mostly in the present day with a few flashbacks to the early 1970s), A Secret Kept follows the story of a middle-aged man, Antoine Rey, who is determined to figure out the family secret, which I won't reveal. In addition to ferreting out the family secret, Antoine's life has fallen apart - his wife has left him for another man, his teenage children are going through growing pains and angst, his relationships with his father, step-mother and grandmother are non-existent, and his career as an architect is in a shambles and unfulfilling. Even his relationship with his sister, while very committed and loving at the beginning of the book, starts to fall apart as he attempts to unearth the skeleton in the family closet. What I love best about Ms. de Rosnay's writing are her characters. These are flawed, very human characters whom we can all relate. We all have family issues of one sort or another and this book touches on all of them.

Some critics of this novel have blasted Antoine as being a "whiny, wimpy man who needs to grow some balls," but I disagree. This character was raised in a household (after the death of a warm and loving mother) where children were seen and not heard, with a tyrannical father, a disinterested step mother and 'very proper' grandparents. Manners and conformity were the lessons this character learned, which have been so ingrained into his personality that he doesn't know how to be any other way. I know people who are exactly like this. They don't want to fight so they just roll with the punches. Frustrating, yes! But understandable given his formative years.

I will say that I found the "family secret" to be very predictable and I had it figured out within the first couple of chapters. That being said, it didn't stop me from enjoying the book. I look forward to Ms. de Rosnay's next novel, The House I Loved scheduled to be released in February 2012. 

"I'm Starving!" No, You're Not!

Like most people, I have a few pet peeves. One of mine is when someone says to me "I'm starving." Really? Did you eat a meal this morning? Yesterday? The day before? Hmmmm, then I guess you're not starving. I have no problem with people saying that they're hungry, famished, rapacious, ravenous, can eat a horse, etc. It's the word 'starving' that bugs me. We've all seen the photos and videos of children who are quite literally starving to death all across the world, so don't tell me that 'you're starving.' I know it's simple turn of phrase but it's the quality of our words. I'm not a fan of always being "PC" in my dialogue, but this one phrase really, really annoys me because there are actually people starving. Just because you have not eaten something in a couple of hours, your next meal is as close as the nearest grocery store, restaurant or home kitchen. Here's my challenge: don't eat for 3 days and donate the money you would have spent on food to worthy hunger charity. Then you can see what it's like to be really hungry. Rant over - please return you to your regularly scheduled program.

Manners, Please!

I love Facebook!  It's a great way to spend an hour or twelve. With Facebook, you can connect with old friends, share photos, play games, etc. It's a really fun social network, but there are drawbacks to Facebook (as with everything). One of the biggest bugaboos for me is: Because Facebook is pretty much an open, yet strangely anonymous, forum, people have no compunction about writing things that they would never say to another person's face. Manners go right out the window. Now I know I'm not exactly Miss Manners or Emily Post but I try to mind my Ps and Qs when posting.

I'll give you an example of Jane and John... No, wait, those names are too boring. How about Sheresa and Cloddington? Much better - sounds like a Harlequin romance novel. Sheresa posted a cute video on her page and I made a rather amusing comment about it (if I do say so myself). Cloddington decides to comment as well, but makes a rather scathing remark about what I wrote. Now, I don't know Cloddington and don't really give a crap about his opinion. After all with a name like Cloddington, you expect a certain type of obnoxious person. (Yeah, yeah, I know I made up that name, but just go with it.) Most likely, Cloddington thought he was being amusing bbbbuuuuuuuuuut his comment was not funny, just plain rude. I thought to myself, "Would he have said that if we were standing face to face?" Probably not. And if he did, I would be able to defend myself, but in cyber world, I'm not going to get into a heated discussion with a complete stranger over a dumb YouTube video.

A couple of years ago, I learned a valuable lesson about posting publicly: I had publicly answered a friend's question about an instructor of one of my classes. Mind you, I didn't say anything terrible (just that he didn't have enough experience to be teaching a 300 level class) and even though I didn't mention his name, the instructor saw the comment, knew I was talking about him and his feelings were hurt. It never occurred to me that my friend and this instructor might be Facebook friends. Oops, my bad! And my apologies.

We all just need to be a little more diligent when posting comments on Facebook, particularly when posting comments about a perfect stranger. With your friends, snarky comments are most likely acceptable and sometimes even necessary. Off the cuff remarks can be hurtful or annoying to people, even those meant to be amusing. Tone is tough trait to exhibit in the written medium. Maybe we should just get back to the basic adage: "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all" - with one proviso. You may say anything you want about Herman Cain - because he's a public figure and a douche bag! (Did you see what I did there?)

"Moonlight Mile" - Kenzie and Gennaro are Back!

Back in 1998, a friend of mine suggested I read a new novel, Sacred, by a then unknown (to me anyway) writer, Dennis Lehane.  By the first sentence ("A piece of advice: if you ever follow someone in my neighborhood, don't wear pink."), I was immediately hooked.  I then went back and read all his previous novels and every one since and have never been disappointed by Lehane's writings.  Moonlight Mile is another hit by Dennis Lehane. It has been 11 years since we last heard from the PI team of Patrick Kenzie and Angela Gennaro. They are now married with a 4 year old child. Angela is going to school and Patrick is soloing in the PI business. Twelve years ago (in the novel, Gone Baby Gone), Patrick was hired to find a kidnapped 4 year old, Amanda McCready. Now at the age of 16, Amanda has gone missing again and Amanda's aunt, once again, asks Patrick for his help finding the missing girl. 

As with all of Lehane's novels, it's a thrilling roller coaster ride which includes a wacky Russian hit man, a mentally unstable crime boss and his equally demented wife, identity thieves and meth dealers and addicts. Kenzie is attempting to right a wrong and keep his family safe from harm. Filled with all the witty dialogue that Lehane is known for, this novel does not disappoint. If you have never read a Kenzie-Gennaro novel, you should start with the first one, A Drink Before the War, and read them all through. They are incredibly fast and entertaining reads.

10 Lessons I've Learned From Judge Judy

Okay, I admit it: watching Judge Judy is one of my guilty pleasures. I say this with pride because I think Judge Judith Sheindlin rocks. Approximately 10 million viewers watch Judge Judy daily, so I am not alone in this sentiment. I have been a loyal viewer for approximately 14 years and throughout all these years, I have learned many valuable lessons from her wisdom.

1. Always tell the truth because you never want to be caught in a lie. "If you tell the truth you don't have to have a good memory" - probably my favorite JJ quote.  
2. Never EVER go on a show watched by 10 million people if you are 21 years old and have 5 kids by 4 different fathers. You will not look good no matter what your position.
3. Don't ever argue the law with an attorney or a judge, especially if you only have a high school education.  You might be able to argue the law if you have gone to law school, but undoubtedly you'll probably still lose.
4. If an intended marriage falls through, return the engagement ring. 
5. Never loan anyone money. It is the quickest way to lose a friendship or family relationship. If a close friend or family member needs money and you are financially able to give it to them without expecting repayment, then do that. 
6. Similarly, never co-sign a car for anyone!  Same reason as number 5.
7. Put any agreement in writing, make sure you read every contract thoroughly and retain a copy of the contract.
8. Don't trust breeders who are 'selling a dog' if they don't allow you to see their facilities. Most likely they are running a puppy mill.
9. Own up to your mistakes and pay your dues.  Don't expect someone else to clean up your mess.
10. Most important: It's better to be smart than beautiful because "beauty fades, but dumb is forever."

I am certain that there are many more lessons I have picked up over the years but these are probably the most crucial. Most people find Judge Judy to be acerbic and rude, but her caustic nature is what makes her show so fantastic. She calls people out on their bull and doesn't let them get away with anything. She is one tough cookie and I admire her spunky nature. Plus she's really, really funny!

"Sarah's Keys" - A Sobering Read...

Due to a rather painful knee injury, I was forced to spend the day laying on the couch, but it gave me a chance to read Tatiana de Rosnay's moving novel, Sarah's Key.  This unforgettable novel was impossible to put down.  After 7 hours straight of reading, I closed the book on the final page and I was saddened to leave behind these characters I grew to love. Set (mostly) in Paris, it is the story of an American journalist, Julia Jarmond, who is assigned by her editor to write an article on the 60th anniversary of the Vel' D'Hiv Roundup, a Nazi decreed and Vichy supported mass arrest from July 16-17, 1942 in Paris of over 13,000 French Jews (men, women and children) by the French police (code name: Operation Spring Breeze). These victims were rounded up and housed for days in the Vélodrome d'Hiver (an indoor bicyle racing stadium), then sent to French internment camps and eventually to Auschwitz where they would perish in the gas chambers. During her investigation into this horrific time in France's history, Julia discovers a link to these events in her own life through her French husband's family and how a 60 year old secret could destroy her marriage. This book has been heralded as the French Sophie's Choice, a worthy comparison. 

Sarah's Key is a reminder of a horrific time in history and how the French conveniently tend to forget their collaborative efforts in assisting the Nazi regime's genicidal program. This is a difficult book to read because of the subject matter at hand, but it is a moving story and one that you will be hard pressed to forget after the end of the story. While it is a work of fiction, the events of Vel' D'Hiv are frighteningly real.  [Note:  I know this was made into a movie starring Kristen Scott Thomas.  I have not seen the movie so I cannot compare the two.] I highly recommend everyone give this important book a read.  You will not be sorry!

The Artist's Way Takes Commitment!

No, I don't mean the book, which just is a load of new age tripe. What I'm talking about is the actual work of being an artist, whether it be performing or creative.  Being an artist is all about being committed to the work, as my dear friend, brilliant actor and acting coach, Warren Kelley would say. After being away from performing for as long as I have been, I've forgotten how much work really goes into creating a fully rounded character.  

Now that's what I call commitment!

I was recently cast in a one-act play and even though it's a minor (although powerful) role, I still need to put in tons of work creating a backstory for this character - why she is the way she is, how she got where she got, etc. But the problem for me is I'm a little lazy right now. I'd rather go out and enjoy the lovely autumn weather or spend time with friends than siting on my couch studying my lines and creating this backstory. Uta Hagen would have lost all respect for me. I think though that my momentary laziness with this task is due to the infrequent rehearsal schedule. Instead of having 3 weeks of rehearsals 2-3 times per week, the schedule is once a week over a period of 6 weeks. Really? That's just too much time in between rehearsals to keep my interest up. My initial excitement over being cast has waned a bit because after our initial read through, we had a 2 week break. So the question is how do you stay committed to the work when you're away from it? I have actor friends who have their entire scripts memorized before even starting rehearsals (Warren!). I have until Thursday to get my lines memorized. If I buckle down for an hour, I can get it done, but I need to commit myself to doing it! The backstory has been percolating and I have most of it done - although I keep changing it daily! She's a complex character - much like myself!    

Despite all that, this show should be interesting.  Therefore - in act of blatant self promotion - if you are planning to be in Newburyport on October 21 (8pm), 22 (8pm) or 23 (5pm), drop by the The Actor's Studio of Newburyport located at The Tannery at 75 Water Street and catch Marc's Shorts, a evening of 16 short plays, all written by Marc Clopton.  I will be performing in one of these plays, entitled Perhaps - a one-act about 6 recovering addicts during a group therapy session. It's a very intense but fascinating play.  (Yes, I'm playing an addict.)  Reservations can be made by calling: 978.463.1229.  Send me a message if you would like further information.