Giving Up on Dreams?

Holy cow! It's been a week since my last post. I can't remember the last time I had writer's block this bad – I've been feeling very uninspired all week. But a thought finally popped into my head today and I thought I'd share it. It's about pipe dreams. Is there ever a time to give up on all your dreams? Everyone has some fantasy that they've always wanted to fulfill – whether it's running a marathon (sickos!), writing the great American novel, or even just living a quiet, peaceful life somewhere. As for me, I've already given up on my biggest wish – being a stage performer in NYC, but is it ever acceptable to give up on every dream that you have? Such is my current bewilderment. 

A couple of days ago, a friend shared on Facebook this photo (↑) of a rose-covered storybook home and I just fell in love with this little cottage located in the Cotswolds in England. I posted that I wanted to live in this pretty house but with my luck I'd probably only get my "tiny cottage" when I'm pushing up daisies. (Hopefully something nicer than a plain pine box.) To which my friend replied: "I can see you teaching in a French or English countryside school house, with your quaint little cottage home and some Mr. Darcy like man tending the garden." I had to laugh. I mean it's sweet, but unlikely to happen. My long held dream (other than performing on Broadway) is to live in the English countryside in a little cottage and teach at the local secondary school where I'm sure the student body will make fun of my "American" accent. (I'd settle for the French or Italian countryside but England has always been my first dream.) But it seems improbable that it will ever happen. I've looked into moving to the UK and it's nearly hopeless for a US citizen to get a work visa. Therefore, much as I appreciate what my friend wrote, it's never going to happen. (The Darcy statement is just too redonkulus to even bother commenting on.)

So is it time to give up on my final dream or do I hold onto this one last wish? When it is time to say "enough"? I've always been a dreamer and, unlike the performing dream, this one is not so farfetched and yet I cannot see it ever coming to fruition.What dreams have you held onto? Which ones have you given up on? How did you decide on whether to hold on or give up?

 

To Fate: "Yes, please!" Fate replies with a slap to the head.

What Do You Do "When Friendship Hurts"?

In life, everyone has been hurt by someone they care about  - whether it's a parent who was disappointed that you didn't bring home an "A" even though you worked your hardest, or a spouse who makes a hurtful comment about something you accidentally did, or friends who hurt you for whatever reason. Yes, we've all been hurt and, most times, we can overlook these hurts and move on. But what do you do when you cannot for a multitude of reasons move past specific hurts; when "forgive and forget" just doesn't work. That's been my dilemma over the past couple of years. After trying everything in my arsenal to move past these feelings, I finally decided to try a self-help book.  Ordinarily, I eschew the annoyingly abundant amount of pop psychobabble books that are available, but today as I was meandering through the self-help section of the library, I came across When Friendship Hurts: How to Deal with Friends Who Betray, Abandon, or Wound You (2002) by Jan Yager, Ph.D. The title intrigued me enough to bring it home to see if it might have some useful information for dealing with my issues.

Synopsis: "We've all had friendships that have gone bad. Whether it takes the form of a simple yet inexplicable estrangement or a devastating betrayal, a failed friendship can make your life miserable, threaten your success at work or school, and even undermine your romantic relationships.

Finally there is help. In When Friendship Hurts, Jan Yager, recognized internationally as a leading expert on friendship, explores what causes friendships to falter and explains how to mend them -- or end them. In this straightforward, illuminating book filled with dozens of quizzes and real-life examples, Yager covers all the bases...

The first highly prescriptive book to focus on the complexities of friendship, When Friendship Hurts demonstrates how, why, and when to let go of bad friends and how to develop the positive friendships that enrich our lives on every level. For everyone who has ever wondered about friends who betray, hurt, or reject them, this authoritative book provides invaluable insights and advice to resolve the problem once and for all."  (from the book jacket)

Review: There's a reason that I avoid pop psychobabble books - they usually are incredibly useless. This book is no different and annoyed me on many levels. It's nice that Ms. Yager has a Ph.D. and people write her letters, but I don't care about that. I'm looking for useful advice on how to manage when people claiming to be "friends" have betrayed, lied, hurt you, and then walked away. She did not provide that. In fact, she dedicates exactly 1.5 pages (out of 184) on coping with a failed friendship. Mostly, this book is about how to recognize what a friend is and the types of personalities out there. Yeah, okay, nice but not exactly helpful or what the title of the book suggests it covers. What annoyed me most, and even offended me, is that this book states that you cannot be a good friend if you have psychological problems, and/or had a less than perfect childhood, which approximately 6 people in the world fit that category.

There was one interesting tidbit in this book, which regarded a friendship survey of 180 people. 68% of the respondents answered "yes" to the question "Has a casual, close, or best friend ever betrayed you?" That is not a surprising number, merely interesting. If my life is anything to go by, it's a remarkably low number.

My hunt for how to come to terms with the betrayal of friends and the subsequent loss of those friendships continues. I certainly did not get any answers from this book.  Fortunately, I didn't spend too much time reading this junk. My advice: do not waste your time or money on this book.

Rating: 1 out of 5 stars

Ball Pits on Every Corner, Please!

I saw the most amazing video the other day.  Take a look:

 

After watching this video, I believe that we need to put a ball pit on every street corner!  Just imagine what a great world we would have if everyone took a few minutes to sit with a stranger in a ball pit and get to know them. One would hope that even the most random pair of strangers would learn to respect their differences and celebrate any commonality. What a fantastic way to reduce violence in the world.

Yeah, okay.  I live in a dream world, but the sky is so pretty in my world - forest green with white polka dots - that I hate leaving it.

Happy Birthday to a Living Legend!

Tomorrow is a most important day! It's Stephen Sondheim's 83rd birthday and in honor of the date of birth of this creative genius, I thought I'd present what (in my humble opinion) is Sondheim's 5 greatest musicals! Narrowing this magnificent composer/lyricist's works to just 5 proved to be so much harder than I thought when deciding to give tribute to Mr. Sondheim. I started with limiting my choices to productions in which he wrote both the music and lyrics, which means two brilliant shows are automatically out of the running:  Gypsy (1959) and West Side Story (1957) (he was the lyricist for these shows).

My list of Sondheim's top 5 shows is - in chronological order:

1. Company (1970): (Book by George Furth) Nominated for 12 Tony Awards/winner of 6, "originally titled Threes, its plot revolves around Bobby (a single man unable to commit fully to a steady relationship, let alone marriage), the five married couples who are his best friends, and his three girlfriends" (Wikipedia). I was fortunate enough to catch the 1995 Roundabout Theatre revival.  It was fantastic.  My favorite song from that show is:  "Not Getting Married Today" (sung by Madeline Kahn in this clip).  This song is a prime example of the wordsmith par excellence that Mr. Sondheim is. 
2. Follies (1971):  (Book by James Goldman) Nominated for 10 Tony Awards/winner of 7, "the story concerns a reunion in a crumbling Broadway theatre, scheduled for demolition, of the past performers of the "Weismann's Follies," a musical revue (based on the Ziegfeld Follies), that played in that theatre between the World Wars. It focuses on two couples, Buddy and Sally Durant Plummer and Benjamin and Phyllis Rogers Stone, who are attending the reunion. Sally and Phyllis were showgirls in the Follies. Both couples are deeply unhappy with their marriages. Buddy, a traveling salesman, is having an affair with a girl on the road; Sally is still as much in love with Ben as she was years ago; and Ben is so self-absorbed that Phyllis feels emotionally abandoned" (Wikipedia).  In 1998, the Paper Mill Playhouse in Millburn, New Jersey had a production of this show which was stunning.  My favorite songs are (I couldn't choose just one): "In Buddy's Eyes" and "Losing My Mind" (Bernadette Peters).
3. Sweeney Todd (1979): (Libretto by Hugh Wheeler) Who would ever consider that a musical about a murderous barber who teams up with a piemaker to create meat pies using the bodies of the murdered victims could be so deliciously entertaining?  And yet, that is exactly the case of this completely wonderful musical!  Nominated for 9 Tony Awards/winner of 8, "set in 19th century England, the musical tells the story of Benjamin Barker, aka Sweeney Todd, who returns to London after 15 years' transportation on trumped-up charges. When he finds out that his wife poisoned herself after being raped by the judge who transported him, he vows revenge on the judge and, later, the whole world. He teams up with a piemaker, Mrs. Lovett, and opens a barbershop in which he slits the throats of customers and has them baked into pies" (Wikipedia)  In 2004, New York City Opera revived this amazing show and while the production had its flaws (namely a chorus that couldn't enunciate worth a damn), it was a sumptuous production.  My favorite song: "The Worst Pies in London" (Patti LuPone). (BTW, the Tim Burton movie did not do justice to this incredible show!!!)
   
4. Sunday in the Park With George (1984): (Book by James Lapine) Nominated for 10 Tony Awards/winner of 3 (he was robbed in '84), "the musical was inspired by the painting "A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte" by Georges Seurat. A complex work revolving around a fictionalized Seurat immersed in single-minded concentration while painting his masterpiece and the people in that picture" (Wikipedia).  I love the video of the original cast (starring Mandy Patinkin and Bernadette Peters), and I did manage to catch the 2008 Broadway revival - which was wonderful.  My favorite song: "Move On" (Bernadette and Mandy) - the harmonies make me weep!
5. Into the Woods (1987): (Book by James Lapine) Nominated for 10 Tony Awards/winner of 3, "the musical intertwines the plots of several Brothers Grimm fairy tales and follows them to explore the consequences of the characters' wishes and quests. The main characters are taken from "Little Red Riding Hood", "Jack and the Beanstalk", "Rapunzel", and "Cinderella", as well as several others. The musical is tied together by an original story involving a baker and his wife and their quest to begin a family, and their interaction with a Witch and her curse on them" (Wikipedia).  Unfortunately I have never had the pleasure of seeing this magnificent show performed live, but the video of the original 1987 Broadway production is simply genius.  My two favorite songs: "No More" (Chip Zien and Tom Aldredge) and "Children Will Listen (Finale)" (original cast).

The truly lovely thing about Sondheim's shows:  for performer's like me (the Plain Jane/Ugly Duckling/Odd Character), there is always a role available.  In every one of his shows, there is at least one role that I would love to play and would be perfect for me - particularly Mrs. Lovett in Sweeney Todd.  I'd kill for that role of a lifetime! So, thanks, Steve, for thinking of us characters actors!

Musical theatre people nearly unanimously agree that Mr. Sondheim is the greatest musical theatre composer/lyricist of all time but there are some delusional people who make arguments to consider Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber as top dog. Lloyd Webber has composed 17 musicals, but in my opinion, only 3 of them can be considered great (Joseph & the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat (1968), Jesus Christ Superstar (1970), and Evita (1976)). All other ALW musicals run the gamut from "craptacular" to "meh". Sondheim has created 19 musicals - 11 of which I consider works of genius. No offense to ALW, but I crown Sondheim - King of Musical Theatre. Oddly enough, my all time favorite Sondheim song is not from the top 5 shows.  It's "Not a Day Goes By" from Merrily We Roll Along.  Here is an amazing performance of this song by the spectacular Bernadette Peters. Enjoy!

In my next life, I would like to come back as a reincarnated Bernadette Peters!

"Night" is Unforgettable!

Books about the Holocaust are never easy to read. Some are downright terrifying and others make a reader nauseous at the sheer brutality. Due to a fascination that I have about the Holocaust, I endeavor to learn as much as I can about it. Just a short list of Holocaust Literature I've read is: The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank, Aimée & Jaguar, Schindler's Ark (aka Schindler's List), The Boy in the Striped Pajamas, The Book Thief, and a whole host of others. Mostly I am attempting to figure out how something like the extermination of millions of people could have ever happened. But how do you explain the inexplicable? Truth be told, you can't and yet I still try. I just finished reading the memoir, Night (1960) by Holocaust survivor and Nobel Prize winner, Elie Wiesel.

Synopsis:  Night is a Wiesel's memoir about his experience in the concentration camps during the Holocaust. The year is 1941 when Elie, the deeply religious boy with a loving family consisting of three sisters and parents, is taken from home and sent to the Auschwitz concentration camp. Elie is separated from family members (mother and sisters), but remains with his father, only to be transferred from camp to camp. Through their perilous journey, Elie tells about the death of family members, the death of his own innocence, the death of his belief in God, and his suffering to a point in which life and death does not matter anymore.

Review: At 115 pages, Night is a fast yet grueling read. Wiesel's writing is at once eloquent and harrowing and his descriptions of survival through the camps at Auschwitz, Buna, Birkenau, and Buchenwald become searingly imprinted on the mind of the reader. Readers may think these facts are redundant but they can never be retold often enough. The book concludes with Wiesel's 1986 Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech which acts as a reminder that we are bound by humanity to fight against the hate that festers in this world.

Steeped in controversy, Night is a haunting, frightening read. Is it 100% accurate? I doubt it, but does that take away the impact of the writing. It does not. After all, this book is often required reading in English classes, not history.  If you have never read this book, take a couple of hours out of your day to read it. You won't be disappointed.

Rating:  5 out of 5 stars

An Uneven "From Notting Hill with Love...Actually"

Okay, I admit it - sometimes I enjoy reading novels that are bubblegum for the brain. While I do like to keep my brain challenged with reading works of literature, I indulge in the occasional chick lit novel, which is why I picked up From Notting Hill with Love...Actually (2012) by Ali McNamara from my local library.  It sounded like a fun piece of fluff which would make a nice balance from my last read - the sad and shocking book, Columbine. 

Synopsis:  "Movie fanatic Scarlett O'Brien dreams of a life as glamorous and romantic as all the big screen flicks she worships. When a chance house-sitting job in iconic Notting Hill comes along, she knows living in one of her favorite movie settings is an opportunity too good to pass up.

Leaving behind her skeptical friends, family, and fiance, Scarlett heads to London and finds herself thrust into the lead role of her very own romantic comedy. But can real life ever be just like the movies? Larger-than-life new friends, a handsome but irksome new neighbor, and a mystery from her past may prove to Scarlett that living her life like a RomCom is more complicated than she thought!" (from Sourcebooks.com)

Review: I love romantic novels and romantic movies therefore I assumed a book intermingling the two together would be really fun. Well, yes and no. Yes, it had the happy romantic ending that one expects, but I found it to be a bit uneven.  Although I will say the book got better the longer I read it.  After reading the first 50 pages of the 425 page book, I had my doubts on whether or not I would finish it.  The nearly constant movie references were really annoying. Additionally, the first half of the book dragged quite a bit and, most importantly, I had a hard time relating to Scarlett. With no other word coming to mind, she was just silly. The other characters shined, particularly the romantic hero, Sean, who was freakin' amazing. I fell in love with him from the start. He's not quite Mr. Darcy, but pretty darned charming. The most redeeming quality of the book, however, was the boisterous, ridiculous, and over the top romantic ending, exactly how a chick lit/romcom story should conclude. I've repeatedly mentioned that I love Brit humor and stories, and this book was no exception - aside from Scarlett. Similar to Bridget Jones's Diary, this story might just be one of those rare cases where the movie version supersedes the book. All in all, it's a good read if you are not looking to tax your brain too hard and have read all the other books in your library.

Rating: 3 out 5

Career Change: "Beware the Ides of March"...

...so said a soothsayer to Julius Caesar.  The Ides of March is a day in the Roman calendar which equates to March 15 and also the assassination date of Julius Caesar. I'm not talking about something quite that serious, but the entire month of the March... (ummm... how can I put this politely...) the entire month of March blows! Yes, I must add March to my list of horrible times of the year, which includes a week in October, all of December and January, and the first half of February. I loathe those times for personal reasons, but March is all about professional reasons. 

March is apparently the month when students lose their minds, or so says all the seasoned teachers I know. Why is March so much worse than other months? We can only make inferences about the reason, but it is suspected that because it's a long month with no days off, it's the month between winter and spring break, the weather is starting to get slightly nicer, daylight savings, etc., that students just don't want to be there anymore. Confidentially, we don't want them there either.  As much I love my students, right now if I never saw them again, I'd be fine with that. 

Take a look at what I have to put up with at the moment:

The addition to my message was written by an honors student who actually wrote it on the board in front of me. Somehow he couldn't figure out why I did not find this amusing. And yes, an HONORS student! Right now, frustration levels are pretty high and ability to teach is pretty low. Good times!

Music Doesn't Lie - Part 17 (I Know the Truth)

"Music doesn't lie. If there is something to be changed in this world,
then it can only happen through music." – Jimi Hendrix

I'm once again on a musical theatre kick this week and have been listening to one of my favorite musicals, Elton John and Tim Rice's Aida, over the past couple of days. It's probably been a couple of years since I've listened to this musical but it is one show that never disappoints. Not surprising! Can you really go wrong when you have music by Sir Elton John and lyrics by Sir Tim Rice?  I think not!

Synopsis:  Aida follows the love-story of Nubian Princess, Aida, and her nation's enemy, the Captain of the Egyptian Army, Radamès. Yet, Radamès is betrothed to Princess Amneris, Pharaoh's daughter. Radamès must chose love or power, and his choice of love leads to tragic circumstances. (Yes, the musical is based on the opera by Guiseppe Verdi.)

I was fortunate enough to have seen this fantastic musical while it was running on Broadway - a couple of times actually (that's how much I adored this production). The show starred an incredibly talented cast: Heather Headley as Aida, Adam Pascal (the original Roger in Rent) as Radamès, and Sherie Rene Scott as Amneris. Three of the most incredible voices ever to grace a stage.  

Winner of 4 Tony awards in 2000, including Best Musical Score, this show is just magnificent. It has some of the best music you will ever hear.  Don't believe me? Take a listen.  Today, one of the songs that I have probably heard hundreds of times took on a more personal meaning for me that it ever had in the past. It's become my signature song, so I decided it must be shared. Here's Sherie Rene Scott singing "I Know the Truth". 

<sigh>  So gorgeous. Thank you, Sir Elton and Sir Tim. You can find the lyrics here.

"FML"

Have you ever had the following thought: "This is the worse day ever! I can't believe how bad it was. Eff my life!" ??? Of course you have. Everyone has had that thought at one time or another. I posted something pretty similar just recently. I have a solution for days when you have those feelings - FMyLife.com. Created in 2008, the FMyLife website is "a collection of everyday anecdotes and stories likely to happen to anyone and everyone, sent to us exclusively by our users, which we then publish on the site. This is a space where you can let it all out and unwind by sharing the little things that screw with your day, and maybe realize that you are not alone in experiencing day-to-day crap." Don't ask me where I've been for the past 5 years that I have just discovered this website, but it is sheer genius.

The postings are hilariously sad or sadly hilarious, but either way, it makes your life seem so much more reasonable. Upon first viewing the site, it reminded me of that old quote: "If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back." (Regina Brett)  My favorite posting (so far):

"Today, I took my daughter on her first visit to the zoo. While we were watching the lemurs, some kid thought it would be funny to start shouting 'MONKEY C**TS' at them at the top of his voice. Now my daughter refuses to stop repeating the same phrase. FML"

Yeah, I admit it.  I find that hilarious!  Check out the website if you're having 'one of those days'.  You will feel so much better. Today was one of those days for me after dealing with an annoying and frustrating "professional development" session.  I came home and checked out FMyLife.com because I figured someone had to have had a worse day than I did.  Yep!  Lots of somebodies!

An Amazing Moment Caught on Video!

An acquaintance shared the below video on Facebook. After watching it, I was so moved that I needed to pass it on.  Here's the background on the video:

Marina Abramović is a New York-based Serbian performance artist, who shared an intense love affair with West German performance artist, Ulay from the mid-70s through the late-80s.  In 1988, Marina and Ulay decided to end their relationship but ended it in a very unique way.  "Each of them walked the Great Wall of China, starting from the two opposite ends and meeting in the middle. As Abramović described it: 'That walk became a complete personal drama. Ulay started from the Gobi Desert and I from the Yellow Sea. After each of us walked 2500 km, we met in the middle and said good-bye.'" (Wikipedia) Wow, pretty mature way to end a relationship.

At her 2010 MoMa performance retrospective, The Artist is Present, as part of the show, Marina shared a minute of silence with each stranger who sat in front of her. Ulay arrived without her knowing and this is what happened:

I was speechless after watching that beautiful moment. Of course, my romantic sensibilities want this moment to be the start of a rekindled love affair. Additionally, I'm so mad at myself, because I was still living in NYC during this retrospective. It would have been an incredible performance to witness and I missed it. 

Remembering "Columbine" - 14 Years Later

It's been nearly 14 years since the Columbine tragedy. What do you remember about the two shooters (Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold) from the April 20, 1999 shooting and attempted bombing of Columbine High School? Let me tell you some of the so-called "facts" I remember hearing in the hours and days after the shooting: 

• they were Goths;
• they were part of the "Trench Coat Mafia";
• they were loners who had no friends;
• they were fans of Marilyn Manson;
• they specifically targeted jocks;
• they specifically targeted minorities;
• they chose April 20th because it was Hitler's birthday;
• they were gay; 
• they shot Cassie Bernall because she believed in God.

All of these allegations are false! I just finished reading Columbine (2009) by Dave Cullen, who spent 10 years researching the tragedy and is considered the nation's foremost authority on the Columbine killers.

Synopsis:  "On April 20, 1999, two boys left an indelible stamp on the American psyche. Their goal was simple: to blow up their school, Oklahoma-City style, and to leave 'a lasting impression on the world.' Their bombs failed, but the ensuing shooting defined a new era of school violence-irrevocably branding every subsequent shooting 'another Columbine.'

When we think of Columbine, we think of the Trench Coat Mafia; we think of Cassie Bernall, the girl we thought professed her faith before she was shot; and we think of the boy pulling himself out of a school window -- the whole world was watching him. Now, in a riveting piece of journalism nearly ten years in the making, comes the story none of us knew. In this revelatory book, Dave Cullen has delivered a profile of teenage killers that goes to the heart of psychopathology. He lays bare the callous brutality of mastermind Eric Harris, and the quavering, suicidal Dylan Klebold, who went to prom three days earlier and obsessed about love in his journal. 

The result is an astonishing account of two good students with lots of friends, who came to stockpile a basement cache of weapons, to record their raging hatred, and to manipulate every adult who got in their way. They left signs everywhere, described by Cullen with a keen investigative eye and psychological acumen. Drawing on hundreds of interviews, thousands of pages of police files, FBI psychologists, and the boy's tapes and diaries, he gives the first complete account of the Columbine tragedy." (from the book jacket)

Review: The professor of my current grad class brought in an excerpt from Columbine for us to read and discuss. I was immediately fascinated by the excerpt and decided to pick up the book from the library. What did I discover? An incredibly well-researched, detailed account of the Columbine tragedy. Cullen addresses many myths that the press created in the first moments after the tragedy and that most of us still believe.

In the 10 years following the Columbine shooting, Dave Cullen sifted through a mountain of information – conducting hundreds of interviews, reading over 25,000 pages of police files, consulting with FBI psychologists, and viewing the tapes and diaries left behind by Harris and Klebold – in order to write a definitive account of what happened that day at Columbine; including what led up to the shooting, what went wrong during the initial response, and the aftermath of the shooting in the community and those permanently scarred either by the loss of loved ones or injury. He also attempts to answer one of the biggest questions that lingers over the specter of the Columbine shooting: Why?

I'm oversimplifying Cullen's book but Eric Harris was a born psychopath and Dylan Klebold was clinically depressed, eager to please, and looking for an escape hatch. Together, they formed a rare and volatile combination known as a criminal dyad (a coupling of an egomaniacal control freak and a doting, depressed side-kick; i.e.; Leopold and Loeb or Bonnie and Clyde). But Cullen does not merely dwell on the psychopathy of the killers. He reports on the practically criminal mistakes by the police, the egregious rumors spread by the media, the recovery of the injured victims, and the anger and eventual healing of the deceased's families. Additionally, Cullen provides one of the best descriptions of psychopathy I think I've ever read (Chapter 40).  It worth reading the book for just that explanation!

My only complaint about the book is the organization. I have never been a fan of nonlinear narratives (stories that jump around in time (one of the reasons I dislike Slaughterhouse Five)). Cullen's narrative is not written chronologically so it can be a little difficult to keep track of the timeline, but that's my personal issue and in no way detracts from the brilliance of his research and writing. Not counting endnotes, the book is nearly 400 pages long and took me approximately 2 days to read. This genius work of journalism was thoroughly engrossing and I highly recommend it. As an educator, it scared the hell out of me; as a feeling and caring human being, it saddened me!

Rating:  5 out 5 stars

Career Change: A TFA Update

It occurred to me that I have not written any updates about Teach for America in awhile. Mostly because TFA has become such an inconsequential, yet still annoying part of my life. But I should give this update as a warning for anyone who is thinking of going the TFA route. Here's the warning:  

Be prepared that if you do not drink the Kool-Aid for this cult, you will be ostracized. Do not have a mind of your own. Do not have any opinions. Just agree with everything they say - no matter how ridiculous, stupid or unprofessional that it might be and you should succeed. 

Of course, I do not take my own advice, because I'm an intelligent, opinionated, strong-willed (read: stubborn), experienced (read: old) personality, who has little time for nonsense and hates to have time wasted when it can be better utilized. The problem with TFA is that they are used to dealing with (generally) 22 year old ivy league graduates who more often than not grew up in a sheltered, privileged world and have very little idea of reality, which is the complete opposite of me. Here's the latest on my experience with TFA Massachusetts ("TFAM"):  

In late November 2012, while I was attending a class at Boston University as part of my Master’s program, I made an innocent comment which was completely misinterpreted by a fellow TFAM corps member - I have no idea who. Because instead of discussing this comment and making their dissatisfaction known to me, this corps member went directly to the Executive Director ("the E.D.") of TFAM to register a complaint. A couple of weeks later, the E.D. contacted me that he wanted to “have a meeting” regarding this comment. I refused to meet with him and explained to the E.D. that a meeting with him is an inappropriate response to the issue and that the corps member should have come to me instead of registering a complaint with him, which would be the professional way to handle this issue. The E.D. told me that he was "disappointed" in my response. <shrugs> Whatever.

After that correspondence between the E.D. and myself, I was essentially cut off from any support from TFAM; not that I care. The TFAM staffer who is supposed to be mentoring me (ha!) has made only one visit to my classroom which was back in October 2012 and I have never seen or heard from her since. This ostracizing by the TFAM staff was not actually communicated to me directly, but the writing is pretty clear on the wall that I am persona non grata. On Friday, February 22, 2013, the E.D. called my cell phone and left a voicemail attempting yet again to schedule a meeting with me about this now three-month old comment. In this voicemail, the E.D. stated that “wants to get back on the track of supporting” me and we can get back to “working together in all the right ways.” (My suspicions were confirmed with those statements.) Once again, I emailed the E.D. that I will not meet with him regarding this issue which is a personal matter that should have been handled in the moment, that the comment was made 3 months ago and well past the time of talking about it. I finally decided enough was enough and sent a letter of complaint to the TFA National Office about the unprofessional behavior of the TFAM staff and am now waiting for a reply.

It is the most redonkulous situation. Remember career changers: TFA will get you into the classroom faster than going the traditional route of student teaching while in graduate school, but there is a hefty price to pay!!!

Side note: a couple of new photos were posted to My First Year of Teaching photo album. Enjoy!

A friend of mine posted this video today and it's awesome. Best video EVER! I hope I'm just like Nana in 40 years. Make sure you listen to her last sentence.  Word, Nana!

Best Album of All Time?

On my way to and from school today, I was listening to Michael Jackson's 1982 best selling album, Thriller and the thought that ran through my head is that many people consider this album the greatest album of all time, but do I think that?  Hmmmm.  For starters, I think I need to narrow down the field of best albums according to decade.  After all, it seems only fair.  It's hard comparing the different decades because music has evolved so much over the years, therefore let me at least list my top picks for each decade - starting with the 1950s. 

 The 1950s:  Sorry, but hands down the best album (and performer) from the 1950s is Elvis Presley's debut album Elvis Presley (1956). Is there really any argument about this??  Let me just list these few songs:  "Blue Suede Shoes" "I Got a Woman", "Blue Moon", "I'm Gonna Sit Right Down and Cry (Over You)". Need I say more? I would love to hear arguments for any other album because you'll lose every time.

The 1960s:  Here's where it gets difficult.  Can I just list every Beatles album??  Okay, no - that wouldn't be fair.  I'll have to narrow it down.  For me, I would say Abbey Road (1969) by The Beatles is the best of the 60s.  I'm sure I'm going to get yelled at for picking Abbey Road over The White Album (1968) or Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band (1967). Believe me, it was a difficult choice. Something about Abbey Road just resonates with me over any other Beatles album.  And similar to Elvis in the 1950s, is there any other artist that would win out over The Beatles?

The 1970s:  Ah, the lost decade.  The decade when the world lost its mind and embraced disco!  Yuck! This decade is difficult for many reasons, the least of which being the disco era.  How do you choose Bruce Springsteen's Born to Run (1975) over Fleetwood Mac's Rumours (1976) over Elton John's Goodbye Yellow Brick Road (1973) over Meatloaf's Bat Out of Hell (1977) over Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon (1973)? All of these albums deserve the top billing, but my heart will always remain faithful to Elton John - Goodbye Yellowbrick Road edges out the others.

The 1980s: I've already mentioned Michael Jackson's Thriller and yes, I like that album, but I don't think it's the best of the decade.  (Although it is still the best selling album of all time.)  My pick for the 1980s is Prince's Purple Rain (1984).  To this day, I practically weep when I hear the title song. Just hearing the opening chord of "Let's Go Crazy" makes me want to get up and dance!!

The 1990s: Okay after the 1980s, I start having issues because I think music from the 1990s through today sucks by comparison.  I stopped listening to the radio by the mid-90s.  I suppose if I have to choose the best album from the 1990s, it would be Nirvana's Nevermind (1991).  Not my favorite but it's the best I could come up with on short notice.

The 2000s:  Ugh! Do I really HAVE to do the 2000s?  <sigh>  Okay, fine.  I suppose I would choose Radiohead's Kid A (2000).  Again, not my favorite, but probably the best of the decade.   

Which wins my vote for best album of all time??

Abbey Road!

For me, The Beatles will always be the best of the best and every performer can thank The Beatles for launching their careers.

I'm sure some people completely disagree on my choices. <shrugs> Check out Rolling Stone Magazine's list of the top 500 albums of all time. Quite a compilation. 

Career Change: "Once Bitten, Twice Shy"

A few months back, I explained in a posting that nearly 99% of my students are either English language learners or former English language learners, consequently many of our idioms go completely over their heads. I have a habit of using idioms as a matter of course and most of my students get completely lost when I use them. Therefore, I started instituting An Idiom of the Day. Today was a funny kind of day...

During one of my planning periods, the assistant principal asked me if I could cover a Biology class for a few minutes while that teacher met with the principal.  Of course I said "yes."  Most of the students in this class I didn't know but two of my seniors were there. We got to chatting and the one senior (a girl) asked me if I had any kids. I told her no but then I said "Well actually I have 90 kids - my students." She laughed. She asked me if I wanted any and I told her that at 47, that ship had sailed for me. She then asked if I was married or had a boyfriend to which I said no. She then asked if I had a girlfriend. I laughed and said nope. She then told me that I should go with her to the Dominican Republic so that she could find me a boyfriend. I laughed so hard and then said that it was sweet of her, but that I wasn't interested.  She asked me "why not?"  Then I said "once bitten, twice shy."  She had a look of confusion on her face so I had to explain that I was hurt badly by someone recently and that the idiom means when you have had an unpleasant experience you are more likely to avoid similar experiences in the future.  She said, "Oooooooooo." 

My teenagers are funny. They are fascinated with my love life... or rather my lack of a love life. One male student said to me the other day:  "Miss, you better get on finding a man because you're getting old." Bah hahahahahahaha!! But I keep teaching them the same idiom lesson: "once bitten, twice shy."   I'm not positive why they are so fascinating with my love life, but I think it's because as teenagers they cannot understand someone who isn't out searching for a partner.  After all, their lives are all about who is dating whom and who just broke up with who and all that other drama. The fact that someone chooses not to date and would rather be alone than in a crappy relationship doesn't compute.  I keep telling them: "Wait a few years.  You'll understand it better."  (Also, as I mentioned in my post from the other day, I'm in the "perpetually-romatically-challenged" category.  Always have been, always will be.)  :-D

See I just don't teach them reading and writing.  Life Skills 101!!!

Do You Have "Th1rteen R3asons Why"?

Are there thirteen people in your life that you would like to send messages to regarding various lingering and nagging issues? I'm not sure I have thirteen people but yeah, I can imagine sitting down and letting certain people know my thoughts and feelings about a few topics from the past. That storyline is the basic premise of the 2007 New York Times best-selling young-adult fiction novel, Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher, which I'll be starting with my English 3 Honors class this week. I remember reading this book in 2007 when it was released and I just finished re-reading it in preparation to teach it. 

Synopsis:  "Clay Jensen returns home from school to find a strange package with his name on it lying on his porch. Inside he discovers several cassette tapes recorded by Hannah Baker - his classmate and crush - who committed suicide two weeks earlier. Hannah's voice tells him that there are thirteen reasons why she decided to end her life. Clay is one of them. If he listens, he'll find out why. Clay spends the night crisscrossing his town with Hannah as his guide. He becomes a firsthand witness to Hannah's pain, and learns the truth about himself-a truth he never wanted to face."  (from the book jacket)

Review:  I remember when I first read this novel, I told everyone who had a teenager in their lives that they needed to have them read it. Six years later and that comment still holds true. This book is phenomenal. I'm actually quite surprised that most of my students have never read this book, but then again - they don't read any books, so I suppose it's not that surprising.  Similar to Speak (another must read), this novel deals with the major issues that most teenagers face these days: bullying, peer pressure, death, guilt, sex, revenge, depression, suicidal thoughts, etc. Winner of several book awards, Thirteen Reasons Why grabs the reader instantly. It's well-written, perceptive, and has elements of a psychological mystery/thriller. The reader is left to ponder the power of words, rumors, and innuendo. Teen readers will be able to identify with the characters and situations, and adults will be reminded (sadly) of their teen years (and people they'll never forget - equally the good and the bad). I will once again emphasize that this is a MUST READ, no matter what your age! Just be sure to start reading it at a reasonable hour, because putting it down isn't an option!

Rating:  5 out of 5 stars

The video below has nothing whatsoever to do with the novel.  I saw this video today. Cuteness abounds in it and I just wanted to share it.  I dare you not to be charmed by these cute baby animals. I really needed some sweet cuteness in my day and this video was it...