Monday, March 30, 2015

Tackling the Practical Tasks of Being Terminally Ill...

There have been a number of tasks that I have ... well ... it's not that I've been avoiding them. I just put them on the back burner because I had better things to do: seeing Europe and the US, but today it was time to start tackling these necessary tasks.

Task 1 - Health Care Power of Attorney/Living Will 

Quite frankly this task is one that everyone over the age of 18 should complete and keep up to date on a regular basis. A health care power of attorney/living will gives directions to your health care proxy about life prolonging medical treatments. I can hear people now: "But Sandi, I'm young" and "I'm not sick." Yes, and tomorrow you could walk out of your house and be hit by a bus. Do you want to be the next Terri Schiavo? I do not. Of course, I have had a living will for years, but it needed some updating. Now, it's all ready to be signed, witnessed, and delivered to my physicians. It's pretty standard. What are my wishes? Unsurprising, no life sustaining treatments are to be given. Done!

Task 2 - Last Will and Testament

Let's start with the knowledge that I did have a will drawn up -- years ago. But times have changed and so has my situation; therefore, I needed to update this document. Fortunately, thanks to online legal websites, this chore was easily accomplished - particularly as my will is pretty basic. Another document ready for signing, witnessing, and storing. Done!

Task 3 - Researching Pennsylvania Cremation

I decided decades ago that when it was my time to go, I did not want to be stuffed in a box and placed in the ground. My plan is to arrange and prepay for the disposal of my remains. I spent some time today looking into crematories in the area and the approximate cost. Next step is to choose one and make an appointment to finalize my plans. 

Task 4 - Dispersal of Ashes

This assignment was more difficult than I expected. How do you decide where your ashes should be dispersed? First off, yes, I want my ashes spread somewhere. I don't want them sitting on someone's mantle. Ugh! Then I narrowed it down to something with water. One of the random facts I once listed about myself is that I love the water - any type (lakes, ponds, oceans, swimming pools, etc.). As I do love the ocean (but hate the beach), I have decided that I would like my ashes to be scattered into the ocean. I think my brother, Tom, needs to fly to Florida and he and my other brother, Tim, should rent a boat (bringing a case of beer with them) and take my ashes out into the ocean in order to scatter them properly.  No throwing them into the ocean from the beach. Uh uh!  I do not want to end up on the sand! With my luck, I'd end up in some jerk's ass crack.

Task 5 - Plan a "Good Death"

I read an article about tasks that the terminally ill need to accomplish and this task was one of them. What they meant by "good death" is: Where do you want your final moments to be -- your home, a hospital, a nursing home, or hospice facility? As with deciding on my ash dispersal, I found this task to be a bit difficult. Ordinarily, I would say I would prefer to die in the comforts of my home, but I don't actually have a home. Yes, my brother has kindly allowed me to live in his home, but it's not exactly my home. If it were, there would be different toilet paper in the bathroom. Plus, it's not fair for my brother to have that burden. A hospital is out. It's how my father died and that sucked! So I suppose I need to start looking for a good inpatient hospice facility. I started with making a list of some area facilities. The next steps would be to go and visit them to see what they're like and if they would fit into my "good death" scenario. Also, as cost is an issue, I have to find out if I can afford great hospice care. I'm sure I can afford crap hospice care, but that's not an option I'd want to consider.

Task 6 - Write my Final Blog

Okay, some people might find this ghoulish but I started to write my final blog which I will ask my brother to post after I croak. As this will be the last words that I will ever post, I want them to be perfect so I will continue to work and re-work this last blog in order to make it perfect. I doubt if it'll ever be perfect but I'll do my best to say goodbye to everyone in a way that will (hopefully) be equal parts of funny, interesting, and poignant.

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I had a few other minor tasks that aren't worth listing but were completed. I feel like I did well today on getting started and, in some cases, completing some necessary tasks. All in all, today was one of my more productive days of late.




15 comments:

Becky said...

I love you Sandi! Even when tackling these difficult tasks you managed to crack me up!!! "With my luck, I'd end up in some jerk's ass crack" GOD that's LOL funny!! Glad your day was productive!!

Sandi said...

LOL!!! Glad you found that entertaining. I certainly laughed when I wrote it. Love you!

Tom Albano said...

I want the same with my ashes. On a boat. In the middle of the ocean. I know someone who went on a pier to dump ashes and instead of going in the ocean the wind made all the ashes go onto the pier

Jacqueline said...

I wish I handled anything ( I'd even take grocery shopping or simply, walking) with as equal guts and grace as you're handling all this. Wow wow wow. :-)

Sandi said...

Aw, schucks. [blushing] Thanks, Jacqueline.

Tom said...

What's wrong with TP?

Sandi said...

LOL. Nothing. It's just not the brand that I like.

Heather A said...

Sandi you are amazing. I have no idea yet how the universe will take me but I must say Thank you for teaching me that death is part of what we all have to go through. You have embraced this journey with such power grace humor and well Sandiness! You are forever my heroine. Wish I could draw it all. Out of you and have you not on this journey. Hate that you are experiencing discomfort on any level. Sending you love and I am so glad I know you.

Sandi said...

Love you so, my friend.

Christy said...

Hated reading this...just saying. But, I still laughed once or twice...confirming how twisted I am

Sandi said...

Well, considering that I wrote it, I'm equally twisted! :-)

Donna P said...

Sandi-
I love your practical listing, sharing , educating us and gosh being so head on! You definitely made me smile broadly and laugh. Then deep down I realize darsh gone it, you are one star of a woman with a flair that is contagious... So ... I will miss the blogs at sometime in our future. But then I realized, as I do truly believe this, we will stay connected here on earth and in the next great journey. Ahhh that knowing makes it feel better. Think I need to get cracking on the Will. I don't have one!
Love you Sandy...
☀Donna P

Erica said...

You had me laughing at the end of the cremation section. xo

Sandi said...

Yes! Score.

Lee said...

One of the many things I love about you is your sense of humor..... despite it all you always seem to add a smile to my face with every conversation or post!! And I agree... ending up in some jerk's ass crack...was HYSTERICAL!!! I love you and know. ..... I value our conversations, pictures, and memories of times spent together!!! Hoping you get some relief soon Hugs, love, and positive thoughts and prayers