Stay Out of My Dreams!

Have you ever noticed that dreams are often riddled with lost relationships? You know, the people whom you have cut out of your life or those who have cut you out of theirs. What is that about?  It's quite annoying. It's not like you have thoughtful, relationship repairing conversations. No, it's weird stuff happening.

For example, last night I had a dream. In the dream, I am walking along a beach and am interviewing for the evening news someone from my past. The interview is about how this person is so happy that months after a major hurricane, the beach erosion has been stopped and is ready for summer. It was sort of a Chris Christie-type interview about the NJ beaches after Hurricane Sandy, but with this lost friend in the role of the governor. It was completely impersonal, yet spoke volumes.

I know that dreams are symbolic and I completely understand the symbolism of this dream. Yes, it's my subconscious working through my desire to have my relationship with this person repaired and have them back in my life -- that our relationship was as turbulent as a hurricane, my desire for the relationship to stop eroding and for our relationship to be "ready for summer", etc.  Symbolically, summer "is the time of romance and infinite potential...If Spring is the time of birth, then summer is the time of youth where one moves through the world with godlike ease and comfort" (symbolism.org). Yeah, okay, I get it. Now go away.

Why does my subconscious do this to me?  It's cruel, depressing, and painful. Having these lost relationships end up in my dreams is sheer torture. Why don't I dream about my healthy, loving, and stable relationships? Oh, right - because they are healthy, loving, and stable.

I'd like to think that I'm not unique in this phenomenon. Does everyone try to work through their problematic relationships in their dreams? Sometimes it makes you not want to go to bed at night.