I am continually being accused by many of my friends of being a pessimist to which I take offense. I am not a pessimist. Neither am I an optimist.
I AM A REALIST!
What's the difference? See that glass of water (pictured). The optimist says, "The glass is half full." The pessimist says, "The glass is half empty." The realist says, "The glass contains half the required amount of liquid for it to overflow."
If you require another example, let's take my now 32 day straight persistent headache, which I mentioned in a previous post. The optimist says, "I don't have brain tumors." The pessimist says, "I have brain tumors." The realist says, "Considering my recent medical issues, I may or may not have brain tumors." There's a significant difference between these three sentences. If you read carefully my Never-Ending Headache posting, I say specifically: "I am not saying that's what I have [brain tumors]. I'm saying that among other things, it could be brain metastases." That is the realistic stance on my headache. Do I know for sure what is going on with my headache? No, I am awaiting the test results.
As long as we are talking reality, here are my realities of three important facets of life:
- Health: My cancer has a 15-20% 5-year survival rate, which means there's an 80-85% chance that I will be pushing up daisies before I'm 52. That's statistics (facts).
- Love: I will most likely live out the remainder of my days alone, because I refuse to run the risk of letting my heart to be broken again. (Particularly as it's still shattered into a million little pieces.) Choice.
- Career: Due to my abysmal 45% passing rate, there is a chance that I will be searching for a new position this summer. More statistics (facts).
While these statements might seem to be sad and negative, they are not. They are simply my reality. I admit that I will never be someone who sees the glass as half full. That's just not in my nature, but never accuse me of being a pessimist.
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| Ha! This made me laugh! |
2 comments:
I've always had issue with that whole half full/half empty malarkey. I believe it's about full vs. half full as an indicator of one's expectations and not optimism/pessimism. Think of it as this, if your goal is to drain the glass to get another you're optimistic that it's half empty. Let's say it's last call, then you would be pessimistic if your glass is half empty or half full. Because if you aren't drunk enough, how are you going to muster the courage to hit on the last ugly girl in the bar you want to take to the No-Tell Motel for a little bouncy-bouncy. Truly it's a stupid analogy and is part of some sort of junk psychology by a quack psychologist/psychiatrist. Then again, I'm a Freudian, where everything is about sex, Mommy hating and how angry I am at my penis. Now, as for you my dear sister, I have the faith that you are a lot like me and plan on defying the odds and telling the world, the doctors and the nay sayers to kiss your rosy red ass and shall outlive them all. F**k 'em. Peace, out. Keep the faith. Don't take any wooden nickels. Buy Bonds. Yada-yada-yada!!!
Use the Force. Beam me up, Scotty. Wingardium Leviosa. Here's looking at you, kid. Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn. ;-)
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