Saturday, February 22, 2014

The Overachiever Mentality...

What is it about some people (myself included) that makes them be an overachiever with everything? I know several people who fit into the slacker mentality (sadly, some of my students), but I know many more overachievers. What are the components of being an overachiever?

Overachievers will spend 50 hours to put together a 10 minute presentation for the PTA. They feel like they are losers if they have less than a 4.0 GPA. Generally, overachievers are the first to arrive at work and the last to leave and rarely take breaks or lunch.  Sound familiar? It does to me.

Today I realized that I might have a problem with being an overachiever. You see I was desperate to make sure that I didn't move a muscle for the 30 minutes as I was getting my MRI. After all I had to be the best of the best patients. I'm like that all the time. Anything I do, I have the need to make sure that I'm the best at what I'm doing. Failure is an option, but it's an option that I detest.

Apparently that's not exactly a healthy way to live, as there is a downside to being an overachiever. According to The Field Guide to the Overachiever by Psychology Today, "People driven to overachieve are motivated by an unhealthy compulsion to show they are worthy. 'Overachievers have an underlying fear of failure or a self-worth contingent upon competence,' says University of Rochester psychologist Andrew Elliot. 'Rather than setting and striving for goals based on a pure desire to achieve, their underlying motivation impels them out into the world to avoid failure.'" We are perfectionists in an imperfect world. <gasp>

How do you avoid the pitfalls of being an overachiever? Here are a few things I've learned over the years:
  1. Say "no" occasionally. Do you find yourself constantly saying "yes" to every request and find yourself overbooked. Just say "no".
  2. Stop criticizing yourself. Accept that you're not perfect and that things are out of your control.
  3. Prioritize! Stop trying to do it all at once.
  4. Run your own race! Don’t get caught up in comparing your successes to your siblings, friends, co-workers, etc.
  5. Take vacations. Making sure that you take the time to relax and rejuvenate is important.
This advice is definitely in the "physician heal thyself" category as I struggle with each of these issues on a daily basis. I actually had to force myself to take time to read for pleasure this past week. Otherwise, I would have spent the entire week reading essays, lesson planning, and doing grad work. Of course, I had to do some of that this week, but I also managed to read about 5 books just for fun. But now I'm struggling not to feel guilty because I didn't complete the work that I had to do. <sigh> It's a vicious circle.

Where do you fit in on the achievement scale? Take the "Are You an Overachiever or Underachiever" Quiz. It's not hard to figure out which category I fell into.

1 comment:

Stacie said...

I am an Achiever. You push yourself, but not too much. You believe that slow and steady wins the race.
You have realistic goals and a good plan for how to achieve them. You work hard.

You keep your eye on the prize, but you also know when to give yourself a break.
You know that all work and no play is no way to live, and you definitely know how to have fun when the time is right.