What is the Worst Emotion to Experience?

Books are written about it, songs are sung about it, plays are performed about it, but living with this emotion is harder than you can ever imagine: 

Unrequited love

If you had asked me the above question 4 years ago, I would have remarked that the worst emotional experience would be "never having loved and (conversely) never having been loved by another", but I know better now. I am talking, of course, about romantic love. I'm not counting familial love or the love of friends. Additionally, I am not talking about 'pie in the sky' "love" ("I love Colin Firth...Hugh Jackman...Kenneth Branagh...etc.") - that is not true unrequited love but humorously implausible attractions, based on nothing real. 

No, what I'm talking about is when you meet someone, immediately feel an attraction to them, get to know them over a period of time, and find yourself falling for that person. Then you add into the mix in which said person gives plenty of indication that they feel the same about you, but for some reason you are not made privy to, "it can never be." But then you come to realization later (sometimes years later) that it was all lies and that person never actually cared for you - romantically. You then feel the fool having spent an inestimable amount of time giving of yourself to someone who never really cared, except perhaps as a friend (and maybe not even that). Seemingly, this person has forgotten all about you and moved on with their lives, while you continue to care for them from a considerable distance (physically and emotionally). Now that hurts! While you wish this person well and hope only the best for them, it doesn't stop the pain.

With all due respect to Poet Laureate of England and Ireland during Queen Victoria's reign, Alfred, Lord Tennyson and his brilliant poetry, I cannot agree with him when he wrote in his poem, "In Memoriam A.H.H.":

                    I hold it true, whate'er befall;
                    I feel it when I sorrow most;
                   'Tis better to have loved and lost
                   Than never to have loved at all.

Sorry, mate. But I would rather not have loved at all than to be living with the constant emotional pain of having experienced a one-sided love. I keep thinking that some day I'll get over this hurt and look back at that time in my life differently than I do now, but as the clock is ticking on the end of my life (as it is for us all), I'm not sure I'll ever get there. Well, we all have a burden to bear and this is mine. I suppose it could be worse.

 

Stupid Cupid!