"Winter's Bone" - Why Did I Bother?

Can I get back the 6 or 7 hours that I just wasted?? Please?!

Often, there are books that are so over-hyped that one feels compelled to read them and then about halfway through one wonders what all the hype is about.  Examples of such books are: Stephanie Meyer's The Twilight saga, Nicholas Sparks' The Notebook, Lauren Weisberger's The Devil Wears Prada (a better movie than book) and The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. Winter's Bone by Daniel Woodrell fits into this category. I know I'm in the minority but this book is a serious yawn fest. Set in the Ozarks, it tells the story of a 16-year old girl, Ree Dolly, who is searching for her father (who is facing charges that he is running a meth lab) before he skips bail and the family loses their house and land which the father has used as collateral for the bail. The subject matter is depressing, dark and gritty, which isn't the reason I didn't like the novel. The problems with this book are many. First, the characters are wholly unsympathetic. I just don't care what happens to any of them. Perhaps if Woodrell had given his readers more of a backstory, I might have connected with (at least) the lead character, but alas, no. Even when she is being brutalized in one form or another, I merely thought, "Whatever." Another problem is that Woodrell spends so much time on environmental description that he neglects to actually give any plot that goes anywhere. Woodrell can write beautifully descriptive passages, but that's about all. I also have problems with the dialect Woodrell writes in, which has been called "country noir" or "hillbilly noir." I found it to be extraordinarily distracting and I get that people talk like this, but being a language snob, I just hate reading a novel that is rife with atrocious grammar. Lastly, there is no redemption found in this book whatsoever and perhaps he is presenting an über-realistic view that occurs on a daily basis, but Woodrell's characters do not to change their lives, which is not annoying. They don't learn from anything or grow from their experiences. Anyone can find a way to break out of their horrendous existence if they truly want to. Tragic heroines piss me off because they don't have to be so tragic. Grow some cojones and fix your life.

I've heard this writer and book compared to Faulkner and his writings, but I seriously doubt that Woodrell will ever receive a Pulitzer for his novels. (Then again, I don't like Faulkner's writings either, so maybe the comparison is not so far off.)  I am not entirely certain how Winter's Bone got all the rave reviews it did - maybe people were paid off or they were all written by the publishing company, but I would have rather spent my time watching paint dry than read this book. Perhaps the film fares better than the book, but as I probably won't bother watching the movie, I will never know.

"Stories I Only Tell My Friends" - And Now the World!

Like most people who are 40-something, I have been watching watching Rob Lowe's meteoric rise to fame, unbelievable crash and eventual career resurgence for the past 25+ years. As a long time admirer of Rob Lowe, I was excited to read his autobiography, Stories I Only Tell My Friends, which is a fascinating look at Hollywood from an insider who has been equally the golden boy and the goat. A uncompromisingly honest and surprisingly funny memoir, Rob has had a truly fascinating life and has met an amazingly diverse group of Hollywood royalty from Cary Grant to Liza Minnelli to Lucille Ball, plus a bevy of politicos, such as JFK, Jr., Michael Dukakis and Bill Clinton. Having spent his formative years in Malibu hanging around the likes of Emilio Estevez, Charlie Sheen, Sean and Chris Penn, long before they were household names, Rob has some of the most entertaining stories of these future stars. For anyone who is or wishes to be an actor, it's also an engrossing look at the machinations of "the business" and the politics behind it all. Additionally, for any performer, Rob shares his insights on the craft of acting, including one of my favorite passages:

"I've never agreed with the conventional wisdom that 'actors are great liars.' If more people understood the acting process, the goals of good actors, the conventional wisdom would be 'actors are terrible liars,' because only bad actors lie on the job. The good ones hate fakery and avoid manufactured emotion at all costs. Any script is enough of a lie anyway. (What experience does any actor have with flying a spacecraft? Killing someone?) What's called for, what actors are hired for, is to bring reality to the arbitrary," (Lowe, p 107)

Huzzah! Thank you, Rob, for nicely summing up what my acting coach and I have been saying for years!

An entirely enjoyable read, I applaud Rob Lowe for his honesty and his wonderful ability to laugh at himself. Good for you, Rob!  Intelligent, funny and honest - it's nice to know he's more than just a pretty face. 

A Little Bromance!

I recently discovered a 'new' television channel, The Retro Television Network, which actually has been around since 2005, but I had never come across it before a few weeks ago. Most of the shows currently airing aren't anything I want to watch (Highway to Heaven, really?), with one notable exception: I have been watching reruns of Starsky & Hutch every night and loving every minute of it. What's better than a kitchy '70s cop show? But it got me thinking about all the great television 'bromances.' My definition of the best bromances are those friends who will do anything for their bro and forgive them for all their transgressions because their friendship means more than any slight. Here is the list of my top television bromances.  I'm sure I'm missing some of your favorites.  If I am, don't yell at me - write your own competing blog.  :-)

1.  Dave Starsky and Ken ("Hutch") Hutchinson (Starsky & Hutch):  For me, the street-wise Starsky and intellectual Hutch represent the quintessential bromance. These guys would literally take a bullet for their partner. They consistently show how much they care for each other - from Starsky taking care of Hutch after mobsters repeatedly inject him with heroin to garner information to Hutch supporting, comforting and making Starsky laugh after Starsky's beloved girlfriend dies. This show (I believe) was the first to give an accurate depiction of a bromance - where they were unafraid to actually show their emotional connection to each other. By far, this is still one of my favorite shows from the '70s. It also helped that I had a HUGE crush on Paul Michael Glaser (truth be known - I still do), which is why I've been having so much fun watching these shows all over again. The only issue I have with this show is that no plainclothes detective would ever drive around in a cherry red Ford Gran Torino with a white stripe down the side - no matter how cool a car it was!  

2.  Dr. Gregory House and Dr. James Wilson (House): Both are brilliant doctors, but that's about all they have in common. House is a misanthrope, Wilson is a humanitarian. House has never been married, Wilson has been married 3 times. House thinks everyone lies, Wilson believes most people are good. They are polar opposites and yet they have one of the strongest relationships currently on television and arguable of all time. They even made the cover of TV Guide in October 2008 with an article entitled: "Isn't It Bromantic?" Although I saw a posted opinion that their relationship is really "a destructive codependency," which is perhaps true - but whatever it is, it certainly works. Even when House, at the end of last season, crashes his car into Cuddy's house and breaks Wilson's wrist in the process, they still manage to repair this weirdly functioning dysfunctional relationship.

3.  Benjamin Franklin ("Hawkeye") Pierce and B.J. Hunnicutt (M*A*S*H): One of the best shows ever (in my humble opinion), M*A*S*H symbolized true 'brothers in arms' - particularly in the characters of Hawkeye and B.J. Knee deep in blood, guts and gore, these two surgeons manage to make us laugh and cry, sometimes in a matter of seconds. They supported each other through the worse kind of hell and managed to play pranks, have a laugh or two and the occasional mental breakdown in the process. The final scene from the television movie ("Goodbye, Farewell and Amen") still makes me cry - nearly 30 years later.

4.  Richie Cunningham and Arthur ("Fonzie") Fonzarelli (Happy Days): I can still recall to this day the slightly cheesy episode ("Richie Almost Dies") where Richie has bought a motorcycle.  He crashes it and ends up in the hospital, where it's questionable if he'll ever wake out of a coma. One of the more dramatic moments on Happy Days, and Henry Winkler's performance was brilliant. It solidified what the viewers already knew which was that these friends were more than mere friends but brothers. (Whatever happened to Chuck Cunningham anyway??) I'm sure in the 1950s, the last thing an ordinary middle class American family would want in their lives is a leather clad, motorcycle riding hoodlum, but somehow it works in this Hollywood fiction.

Honorable Mentions:

Lenny and Squiggy from Laverne & Shirley
Jamie and Adam from Mythbusters (the only non-fictional people on my list)
Fred and Barney from The Flintstones
Sam and Al from Quantum Leap
Jerry and George from Seinfeld

The one consistent thing with television bromances is that the bros are very different characters from each other; generally complete opposites, which is why these partnerships work so well. They balance each other out marvelously. Well done, Hollywood! Which is your favorite bromantic couple? Take this survey.

[Side Note: When I was writing this blog, I did a spell check and every oddly spelled name came up as needing to be fixed, except 'Fonzie' which says something about the impact The Fonz had on our culture.]

Missing New York City? Not on Your Life!

It's been nearly 5 months since I've moved from New York City to Massachusetts, but it feels much longer than that. New York City now seems a lifetime ago. I keep getting asked by random people (co-workers, job interviewers, friends, etc.) if I miss NYC and I give them an emphatic "No!" Okay, that's not entirely true. I missed NYC once, when I was stuck in traffic for 2 hours because of flooding. I kept thinking if I were in NYC, I would have been on the subway and not getting a cramp in my leg from the clutch. Otherwise, I don't miss NYC.

Are there things about the City that I miss? Well now, that's a different story. While I don't miss city life, there are a few things that I do miss. For instance, the cherry cream scones from Amy's Bread, the unlimited amount of restaurants and cuisine to choose from and most of all - my friends. But otherwise, not much else. There's so much to do here in Massachusetts that I'm never really bored. The North Shore provides a multitude of cultural events that I could fill every minute of my day if I had the time and money. Plus there is always the local library if all else fails. Reading a good book, priceless. So no, I don't miss the dirt, the endless noise, the crazy cab drivers, the crowds, the filthy subway, the unwashed homeless, the rude people, the rats which are big enough to ride, etc.

I've been equating my time in NYC as being at a really great party too long. You get to a party at 7pm and by 10pm, you've chatted with everyone, had some nibbles and a beverage or two. You think, "this was fun but maybe I should go home now" but you stay. Next thing you know, it's 4am and you're stumbling down the street, barefoot, with traces of vomit down the front of your shirt, and wondering where the heck you left your shoes. (Wow! '80s flashback.) Out of the 17 years of living in Manhattan, 11-12 were fantastic. It's the last 5-6 where living in the City started to get to me. I stayed at the party just a little too long and it has left a terrible impression. Maybe one day I'll enjoy visiting NYC, but I won't ever live there again.

Here's an entertaining article that The Onion posted September 2, 2010: "8.4 Million New Yorkers Suddenly Realize New York City A Horrible Place To Live." Brilliant! Here's a really fun blog from someone who currently lives in NYC: I Hate New York City.

I remember this! <shudder>

"A Secret Kept" - Decent "2nd" Novel

After thoroughly enjoying reading and reviewing Sarah's Keys (2007) by Tatiana de Rosnay a couple of weeks ago, I decided to read her next novel, A Secret Kept (2010) and while not as engrossing as Sarah's Key, it was still a very good read. Set in France (mostly in the present day with a few flashbacks to the early 1970s), A Secret Kept follows the story of a middle-aged man, Antoine Rey, who is determined to figure out the family secret, which I won't reveal. In addition to ferreting out the family secret, Antoine's life has fallen apart - his wife has left him for another man, his teenage children are going through growing pains and angst, his relationships with his father, step-mother and grandmother are non-existent, and his career as an architect is in a shambles and unfulfilling. Even his relationship with his sister, while very committed and loving at the beginning of the book, starts to fall apart as he attempts to unearth the skeleton in the family closet. What I love best about Ms. de Rosnay's writing are her characters. These are flawed, very human characters whom we can all relate. We all have family issues of one sort or another and this book touches on all of them.

Some critics of this novel have blasted Antoine as being a "whiny, wimpy man who needs to grow some balls," but I disagree. This character was raised in a household (after the death of a warm and loving mother) where children were seen and not heard, with a tyrannical father, a disinterested step mother and 'very proper' grandparents. Manners and conformity were the lessons this character learned, which have been so ingrained into his personality that he doesn't know how to be any other way. I know people who are exactly like this. They don't want to fight so they just roll with the punches. Frustrating, yes! But understandable given his formative years.

I will say that I found the "family secret" to be very predictable and I had it figured out within the first couple of chapters. That being said, it didn't stop me from enjoying the book. I look forward to Ms. de Rosnay's next novel, The House I Loved scheduled to be released in February 2012. 

"I'm Starving!" No, You're Not!

Like most people, I have a few pet peeves. One of mine is when someone says to me "I'm starving." Really? Did you eat a meal this morning? Yesterday? The day before? Hmmmm, then I guess you're not starving. I have no problem with people saying that they're hungry, famished, rapacious, ravenous, can eat a horse, etc. It's the word 'starving' that bugs me. We've all seen the photos and videos of children who are quite literally starving to death all across the world, so don't tell me that 'you're starving.' I know it's simple turn of phrase but it's the quality of our words. I'm not a fan of always being "PC" in my dialogue, but this one phrase really, really annoys me because there are actually people starving. Just because you have not eaten something in a couple of hours, your next meal is as close as the nearest grocery store, restaurant or home kitchen. Here's my challenge: don't eat for 3 days and donate the money you would have spent on food to worthy hunger charity. Then you can see what it's like to be really hungry. Rant over - please return you to your regularly scheduled program.

Manners, Please!

I love Facebook!  It's a great way to spend an hour or twelve. With Facebook, you can connect with old friends, share photos, play games, etc. It's a really fun social network, but there are drawbacks to Facebook (as with everything). One of the biggest bugaboos for me is: Because Facebook is pretty much an open, yet strangely anonymous, forum, people have no compunction about writing things that they would never say to another person's face. Manners go right out the window. Now I know I'm not exactly Miss Manners or Emily Post but I try to mind my Ps and Qs when posting.

I'll give you an example of Jane and John... No, wait, those names are too boring. How about Sheresa and Cloddington? Much better - sounds like a Harlequin romance novel. Sheresa posted a cute video on her page and I made a rather amusing comment about it (if I do say so myself). Cloddington decides to comment as well, but makes a rather scathing remark about what I wrote. Now, I don't know Cloddington and don't really give a crap about his opinion. After all with a name like Cloddington, you expect a certain type of obnoxious person. (Yeah, yeah, I know I made up that name, but just go with it.) Most likely, Cloddington thought he was being amusing bbbbuuuuuuuuuut his comment was not funny, just plain rude. I thought to myself, "Would he have said that if we were standing face to face?" Probably not. And if he did, I would be able to defend myself, but in cyber world, I'm not going to get into a heated discussion with a complete stranger over a dumb YouTube video.

A couple of years ago, I learned a valuable lesson about posting publicly: I had publicly answered a friend's question about an instructor of one of my classes. Mind you, I didn't say anything terrible (just that he didn't have enough experience to be teaching a 300 level class) and even though I didn't mention his name, the instructor saw the comment, knew I was talking about him and his feelings were hurt. It never occurred to me that my friend and this instructor might be Facebook friends. Oops, my bad! And my apologies.

We all just need to be a little more diligent when posting comments on Facebook, particularly when posting comments about a perfect stranger. With your friends, snarky comments are most likely acceptable and sometimes even necessary. Off the cuff remarks can be hurtful or annoying to people, even those meant to be amusing. Tone is tough trait to exhibit in the written medium. Maybe we should just get back to the basic adage: "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all" - with one proviso. You may say anything you want about Herman Cain - because he's a public figure and a douche bag! (Did you see what I did there?)

"Moonlight Mile" - Kenzie and Gennaro are Back!

Back in 1998, a friend of mine suggested I read a new novel, Sacred, by a then unknown (to me anyway) writer, Dennis Lehane.  By the first sentence ("A piece of advice: if you ever follow someone in my neighborhood, don't wear pink."), I was immediately hooked.  I then went back and read all his previous novels and every one since and have never been disappointed by Lehane's writings.  Moonlight Mile is another hit by Dennis Lehane. It has been 11 years since we last heard from the PI team of Patrick Kenzie and Angela Gennaro. They are now married with a 4 year old child. Angela is going to school and Patrick is soloing in the PI business. Twelve years ago (in the novel, Gone Baby Gone), Patrick was hired to find a kidnapped 4 year old, Amanda McCready. Now at the age of 16, Amanda has gone missing again and Amanda's aunt, once again, asks Patrick for his help finding the missing girl. 

As with all of Lehane's novels, it's a thrilling roller coaster ride which includes a wacky Russian hit man, a mentally unstable crime boss and his equally demented wife, identity thieves and meth dealers and addicts. Kenzie is attempting to right a wrong and keep his family safe from harm. Filled with all the witty dialogue that Lehane is known for, this novel does not disappoint. If you have never read a Kenzie-Gennaro novel, you should start with the first one, A Drink Before the War, and read them all through. They are incredibly fast and entertaining reads.

10 Lessons I've Learned From Judge Judy

Okay, I admit it: watching Judge Judy is one of my guilty pleasures. I say this with pride because I think Judge Judith Sheindlin rocks. Approximately 10 million viewers watch Judge Judy daily, so I am not alone in this sentiment. I have been a loyal viewer for approximately 14 years and throughout all these years, I have learned many valuable lessons from her wisdom.

1. Always tell the truth because you never want to be caught in a lie. "If you tell the truth you don't have to have a good memory" - probably my favorite JJ quote.  
2. Never EVER go on a show watched by 10 million people if you are 21 years old and have 5 kids by 4 different fathers. You will not look good no matter what your position.
3. Don't ever argue the law with an attorney or a judge, especially if you only have a high school education.  You might be able to argue the law if you have gone to law school, but undoubtedly you'll probably still lose.
4. If an intended marriage falls through, return the engagement ring. 
5. Never loan anyone money. It is the quickest way to lose a friendship or family relationship. If a close friend or family member needs money and you are financially able to give it to them without expecting repayment, then do that. 
6. Similarly, never co-sign a car for anyone!  Same reason as number 5.
7. Put any agreement in writing, make sure you read every contract thoroughly and retain a copy of the contract.
8. Don't trust breeders who are 'selling a dog' if they don't allow you to see their facilities. Most likely they are running a puppy mill.
9. Own up to your mistakes and pay your dues.  Don't expect someone else to clean up your mess.
10. Most important: It's better to be smart than beautiful because "beauty fades, but dumb is forever."

I am certain that there are many more lessons I have picked up over the years but these are probably the most crucial. Most people find Judge Judy to be acerbic and rude, but her caustic nature is what makes her show so fantastic. She calls people out on their bull and doesn't let them get away with anything. She is one tough cookie and I admire her spunky nature. Plus she's really, really funny!

"Sarah's Keys" - A Sobering Read...

Due to a rather painful knee injury, I was forced to spend the day laying on the couch, but it gave me a chance to read Tatiana de Rosnay's moving novel, Sarah's Key.  This unforgettable novel was impossible to put down.  After 7 hours straight of reading, I closed the book on the final page and I was saddened to leave behind these characters I grew to love. Set (mostly) in Paris, it is the story of an American journalist, Julia Jarmond, who is assigned by her editor to write an article on the 60th anniversary of the Vel' D'Hiv Roundup, a Nazi decreed and Vichy supported mass arrest from July 16-17, 1942 in Paris of over 13,000 French Jews (men, women and children) by the French police (code name: Operation Spring Breeze). These victims were rounded up and housed for days in the Vélodrome d'Hiver (an indoor bicyle racing stadium), then sent to French internment camps and eventually to Auschwitz where they would perish in the gas chambers. During her investigation into this horrific time in France's history, Julia discovers a link to these events in her own life through her French husband's family and how a 60 year old secret could destroy her marriage. This book has been heralded as the French Sophie's Choice, a worthy comparison. 

Sarah's Key is a reminder of a horrific time in history and how the French conveniently tend to forget their collaborative efforts in assisting the Nazi regime's genicidal program. This is a difficult book to read because of the subject matter at hand, but it is a moving story and one that you will be hard pressed to forget after the end of the story. While it is a work of fiction, the events of Vel' D'Hiv are frighteningly real.  [Note:  I know this was made into a movie starring Kristen Scott Thomas.  I have not seen the movie so I cannot compare the two.] I highly recommend everyone give this important book a read.  You will not be sorry!